Oh, by the way....

I'm looking outside, and we've got like 6 inches of sleet.

Mother Nature is a Beeyotch.

Rainwater - Excerpt

The following comes from my script, Rainwater. The scene unfolds around Page 9, and is between PJ & Lenny, two friends stuck in the small town of Rainwater. PJ runs his deceased parents bed & breakfast, and Lenny drives a hearse.


INT. DINER - DAY
PJ and Lenny sit at a booth in the quiet diner. ROSE, an old firecracker in her 70s, approaches.

LENNY

Ah, there she is.

ROSE

You flirting with me, Lenny?

LENNY

Always, Rose.

ROSE

Yeah, right. You’re gonna be driving me in that death car of yours soon enough.

She coughs.

LENNY

Maybe slow down on the cigarettes.

ROSE

Been smoking for over fifty years. The problem is my piece-of-shit husband. He pisses me off again I’ll slash his throat.

LENNY

Ah, young love.

ROSE

What do you guys want?

LENNY

Coffee and home fries. I’m on a diet.

Rose scoffs.

PJ

Stack of flapjacks, go heavy on the butter.

Rose nods and walks off, hacking.

LENNY

I met this chick. Can’t tell you her name yet.

PJ

Dude, c’mon. This ain’t the fifth grade.

LENNY

In time my friend. But I can tell you this - smokin’ hot!

PJ

Wonderful.

LENNY

Don’t be all bitter. Lucy’s gone. You had your chance.

PJ

I know she’s gone. It wasn’t meant to be.

LENNY

Because you have no balls. When you gonna get your head out of your ass and get your life in gear, man? She was the one for you. You can’t just sit around Rainwater the rest of your life, running that termite-infested B&B.

PJ

Hey, the termites are the only things holding up the place.

LENNY

It was your Mom’s thing, I get that, but it ain’t for you. She’s probably rolling around in her grave, pissed off because you’re wasting your life.

PJ

I didn’t come here or a lecture. I came for some fucking flapjacks.

Rose approaches with a stack of pancakes.

ROSE

Here’s your fucking flapjacks.

PJ

Wow, that was fast.

ROSE

Table six didn’t eat theirs.

She walks off, coughing. PJ looks at the recycled flapjacks.

Lenny chuckles.

LENNY

Yum.

Vs.

Ok, which do you use, Final Draft or Movie Magic? By placing in the Final 10 of the Screenwriting Showcase Awards, they are sending me Movie Magic as one of my prizes.

I've been an avid Final Drafter for a long time now, and don't have any real plans to change that. But at least now I'll have some kind of back-up if my computer implodes/Final Draft disk melts.

Which do you guys/gals prefer, and Y?

Three Years For A Healthy White Baby? What Else Ya' Got?

Updates:

Contests - Eagerly awaiting the next phase of Fade In - I have 2 scripts in the quarterfinals - Zucker & A Couple Of Joes. We'll see if they can make it further. Also, I've got A Couple Of Joes in the Screenwriting Showcase Awards where I've made the final 10 - notification of the winner is 3/17. I've already won Movie Magic software, although I've always been a Final Draft guy.

Talent Show - It's over, and I loved doing it. Can't wait until next year. It was nerve-racking, but the kids were truly amazing. Next one will be better now that I've got this experience under my belt. Can't say enough about the kids, amazing, amazing, amazing. The audience loved it because I kept it short.

TV - Watching mostly Heroes, The Office, Lost & Jericho. Heroes is 1st- Season-Lost good, we'll see if they can keep up the crisp writing and cool stories.

Music - Latest CD's we're spinning are Peter, Bjorn & John as well as Silversun Pick-Ups. Just got the new Arcade Fire - DAMN they are GOOD. Buy The Neon Bible.

Scripts - now that the talent show is done, I can re-focus. I've got 4 scripts I've been bouncing between. I'd like to finish Union and The Stand-In, but I'm also eager to finish Westville and Rainwater. Rainwater is an older script that I never finished, okay, I never got off page 6, but I've got some great ideas for it and am looking forward to tackling it again.

Oscars 2008

Last year, I predicted some possible Oscars for this past year. Kinda fun, trying to guess what might be at the Oscars a year out. I actually got a few correct. Well, here's my prediction of what we might see for next year:

No Country For Old Men - Coen Brothers. Look for a Tommy Lee Jones nomination.

Charlie Wilson's War - Tommy Hanks, Julia Roberts & Phillip Seymour Hoffman, directed by Mike Nichols.

Michael Clancy - George Clooney

Rescue Dawn - Werner Herzog directing Christian Bale. Might be coming out too early though (March) to be remembered at the end of the year.

American Gangster - Ridley Scott directing Denzel & Russell Crowe (Would have liked to have seen Antoine Fuqua's version)

There Will Be Blood - Paul Thomas Anderson directing Daniel Day-Lewis.

The Golden Age - Elizabeth 2. Easy Blanchett nomination. Clive Owen, too.

Stop-Loss - Iraq war drama directed by Kimberly Pierce.

The Brave One - Easy Jodie Foster nomination here.

A Mighty Heart - Angelina Jolie could get a nomination here.

Trade - Looks amazing, dark as hell. Might also suffer from being released too early.

Zodiac - It'd be a bigger release in December. I only included it because it's Fincher. Probably wouldn't get any nominations.

The Darjeeling Limited (pic above) - Wes Anderson - Maybe a screenplay nomination.

Sweeney Todd - Depp & Sasha Baron Cohen (both could get nominations) directed by Timmy Burton

Things We Lost In the Fire - Halle Berry & Benecio Del Toro drama.

King Of California - Michael Douglas nomination.

The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford - Brad Pitt & Sam Rockwell nominations.

Che - Not sure if & when this is coming out.

So, if I had to pick the best pics for next year's Oscars, I would guess......

MICHAEL CLANCY

CHARLIE WILSON'S WAR

THE GOLDEN AGE

AMERICAN GANGSTER

RESCUE DAWN

Of course, any or all of these could suck. Dark horses here are There Will Be Blood and No Country For Old Men. If either or both are good, they could easily sneak in and take out American Gangster & Rescue Dawn. Also, I love the Trade trailer and hope the movie is as good.

Keep in mind, there may also be plenty of indies that come out of nowhere and take a slot or 2.

Best Animated possible nominations - Surf's Up, Simpsons, Ratatouille, Beowulf & Bee Movie. Bee Movie wins.

I'd Like to Thank........

Well, they finally gave it to Marty, but with his old gang coming out to give the award, was there any doubt? By the way, glad to see Coppola back in the game, with his movie Youth Without Youth in the can and Tetro getting ready to shoot.

A few surprises, namely Eddie Murphy not winning. And I doubt very much it had anything to do with Norbit. It's not the 1st time he's donned make-up for a goofball mindless comedy. No, I think it's his reputation as a douchebag. He's always been a stand-offish guy, at least from what I've read, and I think people remember that shit. But I think it was probably a close race anyways, but Arkin had a lot of sunshine support in the actors ranks, so he snuck on in.

Also, I figured Children Of Men would win cinematography. And I thought Cars was a no-brainer, very surprised Happy Feet won for animated.

Ellen did a good job, she did what she had to do.

What pisses me off about the Oscars is the actual presentation. They can EASILY cut an hour off of it. Do we need to see the "creation of America through film!" montage over and over, as well as the wacky sillouette people in the background? Or the motherfuckers making sound effects like the dude from Police Academy? If they cut some of the bullshit, then they could actually let people finish their thoughts, or if more than 1 person wins the Oscar for whatever category, they could actually let the 2nd Person speak!

Overall, it was a fine time. Glad Marty got it. And I'm looking forward to the soon-to-be-announced Leonardo DiCaprio/Al Gore buddy comedy, a remake of Like Father, Like Son. C'mon, they'd be perfect!

Oscar Love

It's kinda fun this year, since at least some of these awards are anybody's guess......

Best Pic:
I think it goes to the Departed, but if anyone steals it, it will be Iwo Jima. The Queen has zero chance, while Babel just doesn't hold up as a film (great performances, great sequences, but just too disjointed). Little Miss Sunshine is a fun movie, but the BEST of the year? Nah.

Actor - Give it to Forest, but I've love to see Gosling snag it.

Actress - Mirren, whatever. Yawn. Wish Winslet would upset.

Supporting Actress - Looks like Jenny Hudson. Love that Rinko though.

Supporting Actor - I've always liked Murphy, so I'm cool with him winning, although it'd be awesome is Jackie Earle won, or even Wahlberg.

Foreign Film - Not Pan's. Can't picture the Academy getting behind it.

Director - Marty. But don't count out Clint.

Who do YOU think will win?

Good News!

A few months back I entered 2 screenplay contests, Fade In and The Screenplay Showcase Awards. Sent 2 screenplays to each, and this week I discovered:

One of my Fade In entries (they don't say which one) has been named a quarter-finalist. Yay! I think they announce semi-finalists next month. Fingers crossed!

And, another one of my scripts, A Couple Of Joes, was named one of the top 10 finalists for the Screenplay Showcase Awards (winner announced 3/17).

Sweet!

Next contests on my radar - Bluecat & Austin.

Mother Do You Think They'll Drop The Bomb

My option? Kaput.

Almost 1 year ago (April) I had a script optioned. Yay! Today, the company that optioned that script has dissolved and is no more. Boo!

Prospect Pictures - look them up. They gone.

What happened was they stopped developing new projects back in August (Cricket Hill was still on their slate at that time, however). It turned from a movie script into a TV pilot script.

But it seemed less likely that things would happen, as the more I talked to the director that was attached to direct the Cricket Hill pilot, the more he was saying that it was a great WRITING SAMPLE. Hmm. That's nice and all but.......

Luckily, I still have a good relationship with him. He's done movies, TV, commercials, and music videos, and is a great, great contact to have on my side. And he seems to honestly like my writing, so at some point in the future, I'm sure we'll work together.

Now, why are they gone? Don't know, and at this point, it doesn't matter. I've still got my new manager, which is good. I'm working on the Stand-In (high concept comedy) as well as my family/comedy Union, both of which I plan to finish within the month. Oh, and I plan on sending Union to Austin this year because I'm pretty damn sure I can win with it.

Point is, I've moved on. I've had enough ups & downs in this bidness so far not to let this crush me (this was my 4th option), and in the long run, perhaps it's all for the best.

Team to root for - The Fightin' Phils!
Movie to check out - Children Of Men
Music to check out - Peter, Bjorn & John as well as Silversun Pickups.
TV shows to watch - Flip This House, Intervention, Juvies, The Office, Scrubs, Dirty Jobs, What About Brian, Lost, Bones, Friday Night Lights.
Script to sell - Cricket Hill
Competition to win - Austin

Dialogue Can Be Overrated

Werner Herzog's got a new film coming (hopefully) in 2007, called Rescue Dawn, starring Christian Bale & Steve Zahn, about downed pilots (I believe they're in Vietnam). Looks good, I'm just glad to see more of Herzog's work.

One of the coolest, creepiest, screwiest films I've seen is "Aguirre, The Wrath Of God," starring his favorite whipping boy, Klaus Kinski. Simply mesmerizing. A stunner. Some if its pacing is like watching a snail race, but the end result will stay with you. Same goes for his fucked-up (that's a compliment) version of Nosferatu from the 70s. Great stuff.

He certainly doesn't rely much on dialogue, but more on the image. It got me thinking about how certain scenes can really blow the viewer away with little or no dialogue. I always fall back on the amazing Apocalypse Now. One of my favorite scenes of all time is when Robert Duvall is talking to Martin Sheen on the beach. It's not when he gives his classic "I love the smell...." line, but what comes after. He says, "You know, some day this war's gonna end......" and that's it. He has no words. He can't even think about that day. Good stuff.

They don't make 'em like they used to!

Rogen Rocks

This movie will be the sleeper of the summer. The trailers look great. It's got the 40 Year Old Virgin vibe (same filmmakers) and that's a great thing. Plus, Seth Rogen is the star. I've always loved this guy, funny as hell - usually the perfect sidekick - but now is his chance for a decent lead role, and it looks like he nails it.


Check out the Rated R trailer here.

Check out the regular (still funny) US trailer here.

300

Is it just me, or does this movie look like it will kick our asses?

E.R!

We took the little one to the ER on Saturday, he had ben fighting a cold all week but got pretty listless on Saturday morning. His doctor told us to take him to the ER (we think that reasoning may have been partially due to his limited Saturday hours). Here's how it went down at the hospital:

*Checked in with the ER Nurse, then sat for 10 minutes.
*They called us to check his height & weight, then told us to wait to be called in to register (give contact/insurance info). Waited 15 minutes to register.
*After registering, we waited 40 minutes to actually be seen by a nurse.
*We see Nurse, tells us to wait for Doctor to come. While waiting, a med student comes & takes info about our son, then we wait another 20 minutes for the Doc.

You see where I'm going with this. In the end, everything seemed to be OK (knock on wood - I'm knocking on my head right now) but God forbid this was a crucial medical situation, these people just seemed to have all the time in the world. I mean, this is an ER, right? EMERGENCY room?

I won't name the hospital but for our area it's one of the better ones. We have a closer hospital but I wouldn't want to go there if I was hit by a car in front of it.

The Worst of 2006

Here goes....

The DaVinci Code - Took a fascinating topic/book and sucked any sign of life out of it. I didn't mind Hanks or his hair, I minded the boring script.

Failure To Launch - Not a bad starting point, dude loves living with his parents, but the lame-ass script and boring direction literally put me to sleep.

Art School Confidential - Damn, this movie blows. Hard. Bored me too tears. Awful script, clunky direction, and painful performances. That Minghella kid? I don't are who his Daddy is....Horrible.

The Covenant - It's like The Craft, only much worse.

American Dreamz - Could have been a smart take on pop culture, reality TV, etc. It wasn't.

V For Vendetta - This movie can go fuck itself. Dreary, stupid, meandering, and by the end - ytterly pointless. I really really hated this movie. Snooze.

I'll have a Best Of list in a few weeks, I still need to see a few things. But in the meantime, what were YOUR worst movies of 2006?

My Interview With Gordy Hoffman

As many of you know, there are a lot of screenplay competitions out in screenwriterland. But only some of them are worth their salt, and one competition that I'd put at the top of the list is BlueCat. It's one of a few that I would highly recommended entering.

The following is an interview I did last week with Gordy Hoffman, the founder of BlueCat. Heck of a nice guy! Check it out.......

ME: Why did you start BlueCat? And what is "BlueCat?"

GORDY: As a writer who had submitted to screenplay contests in the past, I wanted to start one from the perspective of a writer. I had a tomcat named Blue, and he died shortly before I founded the competition.

ME: Typically, how many scripts are entered into BlueCat?

GORDY: We had over 1800 screenplays last year, and we expect over 3000 this year.

ME: What's the most popular genre that you see entered into BlueCat? Does genre matter? (Could a slasher script win?) Do you find dramas winning more so than comedies?

GORDY: We find every genre is submitted, with comedies winning one year and a drama the next. I would love a horror film to win. Send them in!

ME: Do your readers read an entire screenplay entry? Just the 1st 30?

GORDY: Every entrant to BlueCat receives written analysis on their screenplay. This means our readers read the entire screenplay. Most competitions do not do this.

ME: What bugs your readers when reading an entry? Typos? Poor Structure? What bugs you? And what are some common mistakes that might get a particular script tossed aside? What kills a script?

GORDY: Misspellings. Describing the thoughts of a characters.

ME: Describe the stages a script might go through when moving forward in your competition. Is it a points system?

GORDY: I personally review what the readers have said, and then I start cracking the scripts, reading until I am in awe.

ME: Have any of the past finalists/winners been produced?

GORDY: Our 2005 winner, GARY THE TENNIS COACH, recently wrapped shooting in Austin, directed by Gary Leiner and starring Seann William Scott. It will be in theaters this year. Two years ago, it was file sitting in a hard drive in Nebraska. Then they submitted it to BlueCat. Now, our 2006 winner, HYUNG’S OVERTURE, is in pre-production.

ME: How long do you see BlueCat lasting?

GORDY: Unless I die, BlueCat will be around a very long time.

ME: There's a boatload of screenplay competitions/contests now. Why enter BlueCat?

GORDY: We have the largest cash prize and greatest access to the industry for a competition that offers analysis to every entrant. When you enter BlueCat, you receive support and prestige that is unmatched.

ME: What does the winner receive?

GORDY: $10,000.

ME: How did you become involved with the High Falls Film Festival?

GORDY: I was born in Rochester, New York, and I am involved in the film community there. High Falls is a great film festival.

ME: Once a winner is announced, does BlueCat help the writer get an agent or interest from a studio or production company?

GORDY: I personally handed GARY THE TENNIS COACH to a producer I knew, and that man was Peter Morgan.

ME: Let's say a writer lives outside of California or NY, how the hell does he/she market themselves? If a screenwriter is serious about making it, do they need to be in California?

GORDY: In general, yes. But if you want to make it work from Atlanta, give it a shot. If you’re writing independent movies, i.e.material the studios don’t make, then have at it regionally. But if you’re writing studio movies, where do you live? You walk to the market and sell your bananas, or you can ship them.

ME: Do you have a writing process, such as notecards, outlines, etc?

GORDY: I recently started writing in a non linear way, simply writing whatever scene I wanted to. I feel grateful to have broken a rigid way.

ME: How do you think the possible WGA strike in the Fall might effect aspiring screenwriters?

GORDY: It won’t. Keep writing. Writers are always looking for ways to avoid the work.

ME: Are there any screenwriting books you would recommended to aspiring screenwriters?

GORDY: Read interviews with the master directors. Fellini, Renoir, Welles.

ME: In your opinion, what is your favorite film of 2006? Of all-time? Best written script of 2006? Of all-time?

GORDY: The best movie of 2006 was United 93. The best screenplay was Hyung’s Overture. All time favorite: The Third Man. It’s not my fav, but I would maybe take it to a desert island. Or Once Upon A Time In The West. Or…..

ME: Tell us about A Coat Of Snow. Where did the story come from?

GORDY: I saw a limo of girls at a Burger King and thought that would be a good idea for a digital movie.

ME: Is it beneficial for a writer to direct their screenplay?

GORDY: If you know how to direct. It’s a different thing you know.

ME: How do you feel about the digital filmmaking revolution?

GORDY: I have never shot on film and probably never will. Film is over.

ME: Are you currently working on any other projects?

GORDY: I am writing a digital movie about war.

ME: If you weren't a screenwriter/director/producer/competition kingpin, what would you be doing?

GORDY: I would be an economist.

For more information about the BlueCat Screenplay competition, or to enter, click here.

Children Of Men - This must be seen.

I touched on this earlier, but all I can say is I was floored, from start to finish, with CHILDREN OF MEN.

Please see it in the theater.

The performances are all top-notch, with Clive Owen & Michael Caine leading the way. Love to see Caine pick up a supporting Oscar nod for his work here, but it seems Hollywood's already made up its mind about the nominations, we'll see next week.

The screenplay is haunting, and the plot is actually pretty scary. It just won the USC Scripter award so I'm hoping this will help get it a nomination for adapted.

The direction & cinematography are what defines this film. Breathtaking. Astounding. I can't explain how amazing the direction is, from the brutal action scenes (the car, the apartment) to the calmer scenes (the scene in the school is one of my favorites) and the fact that these are all one long take makes it even more thrilling.

The music is perfect as well. Haunting.

This is the kind of movie that kicks me in my skinny ass, a wake-up call that says - Get it in gear, shithead. And I'm talking about in life and career.

The last movie to floor me upon first viewing was Saving Private Ryan, others to do so in the past were Glory, Platoon, Fearless, and Field Of Dreams.

Children of Men will join them as one of the best I've seen. It's one of the greatest achievements in cinema in a long time.

Go see it.

Da King

Oscar forecast 2007 - Best Actor: Michael Douglas

It's nice to see a decent poster once in a while instead of the fake-ass air-brushed/photo-shopped faces. Anyway, I think this movie will rock.

Children Of Men - Oh, man!

Easily the best of 2006. I'll be making my top 10 of 2006 list soon, there's still a few flicks I need to see, but Children Of Men is far & away the best I've seen from last year. Simply amazing.

My new script, UNION, is still holding together great, and it's been a blast to write.

Also, look for my interview with Gordy Hoffman, founder of the kick-ass BlueCat Screenplay Competition. I'll be posting it soon.

M. Night's Avatar

On the heels of JC's Avatar, M. Night is also planning on making a movie called Avatar, although his is based on the Nickolodeon cartoon. The only question is, whose will retain the title. A dude from Fox (producing JC's Avatar) said: "We own the movie title 'Avatar.' There won't be another film called 'Avatar' coming from anyplace."

Damn! Tough guy!

Jimmy Cameron's Avatar - 2009

Just to let y'all know that James Cameron begins principal photography in April on Avatar, his Titanic follow-up. It will be released in Summer, 2009. It is going to be filmed in 3D for release in some fancy new 3D digital format.

According to 20th Century Fox:

"AVATAR is also an emotional journey of redemption and revolution. It is the story of a wounded ex-marine, thrust unwillingly into an effort to settle and exploit an exotic planet rich in bio-diversity, who eventually crosses over to lead the indigenous race in a battle for survival. "

Sweet! I just pray it's no Fifth Element, one of the worst movies ever created.

So far, Sam Worthington (he's Australian) and Zoe Saldana (she's hot)have been cast. Special effects will be handled by Peter Jackson's WETA.

Oh Seven

Let's cut to the chase:

January:
1/12
Pathfinder - Vikings Vs. Indians. Could be good. Looks like Apocalypto meets 300, which might not be a bad thing.

Alpha Dog - Legal troubles, Sexyback, not sure how the flick will turn out. I'll catch the DVD and let you know.

1/19
The Hitcher - Remake, seems to flip the roles of the original (seems like the boyfriend will be torn apart like the girlfriend in the original), starring the hot as heck Sophia Bush. The original is an amazing, kick-to-the-balls thrill ride, we'll see how this one goes....when the DVD comes out.

1/26
Blood & Cocoa, I mean Chocolate. Dumb as shit title, movie looks even dumber, plus if you've seen the trailer you've seen ALL of the movie. From the creators of Underworld - which suck balls so I'll wait 'til this is on HBO so I can still NOT watch it.

Smokin' Aces - Looks freaking great. I'm there.

February:
02/09
Hannibal Rising - More H. Lecter, when he was young. Yawn. Rumor has it he might not have had the best upbringing. This will bomb.

02/16
Black Snake Moan - Ricci's hot!

02/23
The Number 23 - Or "5" if you add the 2 & 3. Depends how you look at it.

March:
03/02
Zodiac - Might be good, the trailer actually starts off ok but then turns sucky.

The Hills Have Eyes 2 - Amazing teaser trailer.

03/09
300 - Wow.
Reign Over Me - Sandler. Cheadle. DVD.
Fast Track - Go Bateman!

03/30
Blades Of Glory - Could be hilarious. Or not.

April:
04/07
Grindhouse - Hope it's good, it's gotta be better than their last 2 movies, Kill Billy & Shit City. Still, it seems like they're wasting time with this kind of stuff.

04/13
Trade - Amazing trailer. Looks like a must-see.

May:
05/04
Spidey 3 - Looks great. It might even make a buck or 2.

05/11
28 Weeks Later - Not necessary, but I haven't seen a trailer yet. Jury is out.

05/18
$hrek 3

05/25
Pirate$ 3 - Wow, May should be the biggest grossing month in the history of cinema.

June:
06/13
Ocean's 13 - Wow, and it's on the 13th! It actually looks like fun.

06/15:
Fantastic 4 - Nice teaser. Could be a fun ride. The 1st ain't great, but I'll watch it when it's on.

06/29
Ratatouille - C'mon Pixar, kids can't say the damn title. At all. Are they gonna rush to Mcdonald's for Ratatouille toys? Plus, they already saw Flushed Away....actually they didn't. It sank. I love Pixar stuff, but I don't see this doing all that, which means 140 million.

Live Free Or Die Hard - Great teaser, could be fun. Again, not necessary as movies go, but what the hell.

Evan Almighty - DVD.

July:
07/04
Transformers - This might actually kick some ass. The current teaser trailer is great.

License to Wed - Jim from The Office + Mandy Moore, could be the date movie of the Summer.

07/13
Potter

07/27
The Simpsons Movie

August:
08/03
The Bourne Ultimatum - Paul Greengrass is back at the helm, which rocks.

08/10
Rush Hour 3 - Why?
Alien Vs. Predator - Why?

08/17
Knocked Up - Judd Apatow - Probably hilarious.

September:
09/14
Michael Clayton - Clooney. Oscar stuff.

October:
10/19
30 Days of Night - Vampires in Alaska during their 6 months of darkness. Great idea. But so was Underworld.

November:
11/02
Bee Movie - Written by $einfeld, animated. This year's Happy Feet.

11/09
Fred Claus - Fun.

11/16
Beowulf - Animated like Monster House, could be amazing.

December:
12/07 - The Golden Compass

12/14
Ripley's Believe It Or Not - jim Carrey & Timmy Burton.
I Am Legend - The end of the world, Big Willie Style.

12/21
Hairspray - (Wretch)


Very tentative list, some highlights from each month. Release dates will shift, more movies will get added, but you get the general idea of what's coming in 2007. What do you want to see the most?

I'll be taking these Huggies, and any cash ya got.

2006 was pretty good in the writing department. Had an option, got a manager (which pissed off the old manager, a friend, which sucked, but I gots to think of my career, no?).

Did major re-write work on Cricket Hill (A feature turned into a TV pilot) as well as my comedy feature script, Food Fight. Waiting to hear responses on both.

As for original stuff, I completed work on WHITE GOLD, a comedy set on an indie movie set. It was fun to write, it's nothing that would sell, but would be perfect for an indie filmmaker (low budget, minimal cast, 1 location). Also, wrote ZUCKER, a romantic comedy/chase epic.

And I'm starting off 2007 strong like bull. I'm hard at work on UNION, which is going so fanfuckingtastic I can't believe it. I'm actually sailing through Act 2. It's all coming together quite nicely. It's been a while since a script came pouring out of my like this, the last one was probably Cricket Hill back in late 2002/early 2003. I won't tell much about it yet, I'll just say it's about a family comedy. And it's REALLY good. Can't wait to send it out.

Late!

Resolution - 2007

Sell

a

god

damn

script

!

Happy New Year!

NEWSFLASH NEWSFLASH INDY 4 INDY 4

Lucas has finally said Ok to a script and they'll start filming in 2007, releasing Indy 4 in May of 2008.

Da Worst

Oh my Christ, Domino was a complete mess. Finally got around to seeing it, and it had to be the worst movie I've seen in quite some time. I wanted it to be great. Cool. Kick-ass. It wasn't. I blame the script, although I'm hoping for Richard "Donnie Darko" Kelly's sake that it was ripped apart prior to production - because it stunk.

I liked the idea of the movie, the actors did the best they could with the trash they were given, and some of the action scenes were ok - I think. With Tony Scott's "directing" of late, you simply can not tell what the hell is going on. All of his scenes are a mess of useless flashes and jumpcuts. He's never been a great director but at least with his past successes, stuff like Top Gun and Days of Thunder, you could see that he knew how to put scenes/sequences together.

I think with True Romance he started to decline, depending too much on visual gimmicks. Enemy Of the State was a good effort, at least he had some actual direction going on, however, he threw all that out the window with Man On Fire and this tragedy on film - Domino. Tony - just make a movie that we can see and enjoy without having a fucking seizure.

I did see another God-awful movie - A Sound Of Thunder, starring Eddie Burns. Holy shit was this bad. Decent concept, but what an atrocious execution. The F/X in this steaming pile of llama shit made the effects in Space Pirates seem cutting edge. How could they have edited this together, added the effects, and said - Yup! It's awesome!! Wow. Bad.

These pieces of crap got me thinking though, of bad movies that you can actually enjoy that they're so bad. Like Arnie's Commando. Loved that! He throws the pipe into the baddie at the end and says "Let off some steam, Bennett." Classic. John Matrix rocks.

Two questions - what are some of the worst movies you've seen lately, and what movie (or movies) are really really bad but you still love them?

X-Mas

Merry Christmas!!!!!

It's funny. This time last year I was saying the same thing on this blog, and that one goal was to get writing off the ground finally and leave my day-job-pays-the-bills-thing behind and get my writing career going full-time.

Haven't quite done that yet. Things are still on the move, had some action this year on scripts and stuff, and I do believe I'm closer, but nothing has officially sold and my pilot isn't in production or anything, so while I'm closer, I'm not all that close. I'm hoping to kick some serious ass in 2007 though. And I hope you guys/gals do the same!!

Happy holidays.

King Of California

Well, 2007 is looking to be quite a year. i'll do a forecast soon of at least the shit that interests me. Anyway, following Trade, here's another film that looks like a good one, King Of California, starring Michael Douglas. Loved him in the awesome Wonder Boys. I like how he doesn't stick to the glossy stuff, he jumps in and out of indies every now and then like Bruce Willis. Check out the trailer.

Trade

So far, this is my #1 film to see in 2007, hands down. Amazing trailer, best since Little Children. But this is also an important film, a must-see. Check out the trailer. Amazing stuff.

Holla!

Sorry, I had to.

Some updates - New plan for Cricket Hill - We've decided to turn the pilot back into a 1 hour pilot, which I'm totally ok with. The first several drafts I made were 1 hour, so it'll be easy to re-expand it. The main reason is that it's more of a comedy/drama in its tone, not really a sitcom-ish line-line-punchline, line-line punchline type of story. So I'll be working on that, we've got a couple pretty big TV producers that we're taking it to soon.

Still plugging away on The Stand-In. My Manager is super-excited about this, he's already pitched the idea to a few of his peeps in H-Wood and they've all said it's something they'd like to see. The plan is to have that script completed next.

Haven't gotten to the movies lately, but if I did go I would NOT see Deja Vu (it just doesn't do anything for me, but I'll catch it on HBO) or The Nativity Story (doesn't look at all interesting). But I would like to see We Are Marshall. It just looks so damn inspiring and all, yeah, it's sure to make me weep like an open sore. I just gotta see it.

Saw Nacho Libre on DVD, enjoyed it, didn't blow me away. also saw The King which was an interesting movie, it was well done, but one you'd never have to watch again.

Music - I love that Fray song, How To Save A Life. Oh that's a good one. Broke out an old mix tape and caught some of my 90s goodies - James, Ride, Ocean Blue, REM, New Order, Depeche Mode, great stuff.

TV - We've been watching My Boys, a new sitcom on TBS. It's actually a very funny show, well written, and the cast is great. Nip/Tuck blows hard this year. Not into Daybreak at all. Still loving The Office, and my wife and I are hooked on Heroes, Friday Night Lights, 30 Rock, Studio 60, and Dexter. Oh, and Dirty Jobs!

Best Pix? Well, so far it's been United 93 at most of those critics awards, with Eastwood's Letters From Iwo Jima taking some. It looks like it'll go down like this for the Best Pic race:

United 93 (my fave of '06)
Letters From Iwo Jima
The Departed
Dreamgirls

As for #5, it'll likely be Little Miss Sunshine, Babel, or Pursuit Of Happyness.

Script Excerpt - Temp'd

The following excerpt is the beginning 3.5 pages of Temp'd. In a nutshell, it's about 3 buddies who gets jobs as temps in order to rob an escort service located in the same building. No, that is not an official logline. Also, sorry for the format, I know some of you post excerpts and they look all page-like, but I ain't be knowing how to do that. Anyways, here it is......

TITLE CARD ON BLACK: “SEND LAWYERS, GUNS AND MONEY....THE SHIT HAS HIT THE FAN...” WARREN ZEVON

FADE IN:
INT. CAR - DAY
Three men in their early 30s sit in the car. In the back seat is MORRIS. In the front are DAK (driving) and ED.They are stopped, waiting for a bunch of geese to cross the road.

MORRIS

This is bullshit.

DAK

Lotta damn ducks here.

ED

They’re geese, dude.

DAK

Ducks, geese, what do you fucking care?

ED

Just drive around.

DAK

They’re all over the road, I can’t.

MORRIS

Ed, ain’t they pissing you off?

ED

I like geese. Look at them. Just minding their own fucking business. They don’t give two shits about us.

MORRIS

Well, I say we run them down.

ED

No way. Don’t you wish we could be like that? Like, people in general I mean. Just kinda doing our own thing, not getting in everybody’s face. Just living life, man.

DAK

You’re nuts.

MORRIS

I don’t wanna be like no damn bird.

ED

I didn’t say I wanted to be a fucking bird, Morris. It’s a fucking metaphor.

DAK

Since when are you all thoughtful?

ED

What crawled up your ass and made you Mr. Bitter?

DAK

I’m not Mr. Bitter.

ED

Sure you are. Dak Bitter. That’s your new name.

DAK

I don’t want a new name.

MORRIS

Up your ass with your metaphors. Let’s kill the birds.

DAK

I am not driving over them. This is my car. I just washed it. I even waxed it.

MORRIS

Then we should have a party because you cleaned your car.

DAK

Look!

They look, there’s just one left.

DAK

Go, bird!

ED

Follow your bird-friends! Go on!

MORRIS

Move, you fucking bird!

The fucking bird stands there.

DAK

What an asshole. Look at him.

MORRIS

How about now, Ed? Still wanna be like a bird?

Ed looks out at the road. The bird seems to stare directly at him.

ED

Fine.

Ed steps out of the car and approaches the bird.

BIRD

AACCK! AACCK! AACCK!

Ed draws a gun, aims and BAM!

TITLE CARD ON BLACK: 3 Weeks Ago
INT. ELEVATOR - DAY
Standing in the elevator with Ed is JULIA (early 20s). NEIL (late 20s) runs in as the door is closing.

NEIL

Three, please.

ED

We’re all going to three. We’ve been going to three all week.

NEIL

Good morning to you, too, sunshine.

(to Julia)

What’s your name again?

JULIA

Julia.

NEIL

I’m Neil.

Julia nods politely.

NEIL

Oh. Gonna be like that, are you? Your shit don’t stink? I bet you a twenty it stinks. I bet you twenty more that it stinks like shit.

Silence as the elevator travels. Neil farts.

NEIL
Whoa, speak of the devil. That was me. Don’t worry about it everybody.

They’re all disgusted.

INT. HALLWAY - DAY
The elevator door opens. They get off quickly, waving away the odor.
MR. STONE (late 30s) approaches.

MR. STONE

TGIF!

They stare at him blankly

A Piss Poor Logline

I saw this logline on the Movie-bytes website, and it made me wish explosive diarrhea on myself. Here it is, for a script called Operation Longbow, Before 9-11:

"Aborted attempted assassination of a terrorist, in the Sahara by the use of a special sniper rifle called the Longbow. However, most of the story and subtext deals with serial murders in New Orleans during the height of Mardi Gras."

And my reply is - What? C'mon dude. First of all, your title is insanely dumb. 2nd, this logline is complete shit. If you (the writer of this crap) happens across my blog, I hope you're not too offended. I don't mean to make you feel like an asshole, but have you read the logline? It's terrible. All it sounds like to me is a really stupid, shall I say retarded, idea.

I'd hate to read the synopsis, probably make me want to beat Tom Crymes with a shovel.

My point: As most of you (except for Mr. Longbow) are aware, your logline is your first attack on a producer. If it comes across as dopey-sounding as this, do you think they'd really want to read the script? Hello, no. And if they do, well, then you deserve each other.

These Darn Kids of Today

What the hell do they like? I've been thinking over the past few days, what movies/tv shows/music will stay with them?

Back when I was a kid, there was a ton of stuff that always amazed us, inspired us. Like the original Star Wars Trilogy. Amazing stuff. I can still watch them now and wax nostalgic. (Don't get me started on the prequels again..............). But these were movies that changed everything. And stuff like Jaws, Close Encounters, Gallipoli, Manhattan, Indiana Jones.

What will the kids of today remember in 10, 20 years? Lord Of the Rings? Maybe, but it's not really a movie/series you can just toss in for a good time, and I think most of the fans from those epics were geeks my age and older anyway.

"Remember that time when we were playing with our Yu-Gi-Oh cards?"
"Oh, man, how 'bout that time when we were watching the Wiggles and they say about potatoes?"
"Guess what I made with Floam?!"

I just can't see it.

TV always had something cool on. From Dungeons & Dragons on Saturday mornings, to Star Blazers, Thunderbirds 2086 (not the marionettes/puppet things) and of course, the original Muppets.

Music - I listened to a lot of stuff growing up, I even went through a Quiet Riot phase, and my first favorite band was Asia. Thankfully I got some sense and moved on to stuff like U2, REM, 10000 Maniacs, Radiohead, Youth Group, etc (although I'll still give Asia a blast when it comes on the radio).

But what will this generation listen to as "Classics?" London Bridge? Milkshake? My Humps? God, I hope not.

Strike back below with some of your oldies/favorites from "back in the day." Also, what will be remembered from now in 10 or 20 years?

The End Must Be Near

While I was in my office this morning, doing some paperwork (i.e. taking a dump, pinching a loaf, dropping a deuce, whatever the kids are calling it nowadays) I came up with some evidence that the end of the world may be approaching. Or, at least a list of crap that gives me agita. Evidence:

1. Holiday Shoppers Have Been and Always Will Be Douchebags: This is mainly in America, and to be more specific, Wal-Mart, but my God how we are asswipes. Just watching the video footage of all of us dumb cattle lined up in front of the stores at 4am, waiting for the doors to open and then BAM! GO! GO! GO! Beating the tar out of each other for a Tickle Me Elmo, a Wii, or a Baby-Vomits-A-Lot, whatever the hot toys are.

2. Speaking of Video Games: What is with these new systems? Why in the hell do I have to stand up to play a god damn video game? Can't I just sit on my ass anymore? Isn't the point of videogames so we can chill out while playing videogame tennis? Why would I want to actually stand there and pretend I'm hitting the ball with my wand or whetever they call it. If I wanted that experience, I'd GO PLAY TENNIS.

3. Tara Reid

4. Straight-To-DVD sequels: I've posted about this before so I won't rant much here, but the funny thing is they make sequels to ANYTHING now. There's actually a Behind Enemy Lines 2 now available on DVD. Awful.

5. Our Prez. Weren't we after Osama? Not anymore? Oh, he's hiding? Still? I thought we had some type of trained soldiers/high tech missles that could take care of that problem. Oh, hell let him go, let's dump another 10 Billion into Iraq/losing more troops.

6. Alan Cumming's personality: I don't know the guy, but to me he just seems like a real bonafide asshole.

7. Michael Richards: Yeah, he's done.

8. Screenwriters (non-professionals) Continue To Get the Shaft: Dear Assholes who want to rip off us already poor screenwriter wannabes - We hate you and hope you drown in a bucket of your own diarrhea. We're already struggling and have enough to stress out about. I'm talking about demonfuckers like the Screenplay Agency, and they're not the only ones, who are out there ready to feast on our wallets.

9. Neve Campbell says UK writers are better than American writers: She said, "The writers are more talented here (UK). People don't just pick up a pen and say, 'I'm going to write a screenplay', which happens all the time in LA. They have some background in literature before they decide to come up with a story." Oh yeah?! You wanna fight, beeyotch?! I bet some UK "writer" would have never thought up "Failure to Launch!" Or "Son Of The Mask." Or "Meatballs 4!" Or "Behind Enemy Lines 2!" In your face, Neve, as in Neva ever!

10: Britney: We feel your pain, Mr. K-Fed was a tool, but we kinda told you that from the start. But we're glad you got smart. Or, whatever. But please, if you wish to continue to have us on your side, please, please, please, when wearing a very short skirt, it may be wise to wear undergarments, and stay away from Paris "Cokefiend" Hilton.

Just a fun list of shit that bothered me lately, so maybe the world isn't ending yet. Feel free to add to the list.

Temp'd!

Got a new script that I'm blasting my way through. It's the fastest I've written something in years. Yeah, I'm talking about another new script, but it's actually a combination/hybrid of 2 old scripts and forged with a new plot.

It's called Temp'd (like Punk'd). The 2 scripts this was born from are:

1. Temp'd. This was a short script I meant to shoot a few years ago but never got around to it, basically a day in the life of a group of office temps. I was going to make it into a feature script keeping this premise but feared comparisons to Office Space & The Office (USA/UK) so I abandoned that idea.
2. Wait A Minute - This was a script from about 4 years ago, a crime comedy about 4 loser buddies who start working for the mob and get in all sort of trouble/wackiness. I even started to shoot it on DV in 2003 but we never completed the project, but we did make an extended trailer out of it.

I bascially took 3 of the characters from Wait A Minute and stuck them in the temps/office setting and came up with a new plot - 3 Friends get jobs as temps in a high-rise office so they can break into a high-class escort service, located on the floor above their office, on its busiest, most lucrative day of the year.

I'm having a good time with it. The 1st night, I wrote 18 pages, the next night I took it through page 30, and tonight I pushed it past 40, so I'm just rolling along with it, and since I'm 1000% into this over anything else right now, I must continue to roll with it.

High-Five!

Borat - My Review:

Offensive.
Disgusting.
Hilarious.

Yeah, I'm sure portions were set-up (but counting the number of lawsuits, maybe not that many). Even still, I knew going in it was not a REAL documentary, so although some of it was staged, it was all still funny to me.

Still, the best part of it for me, or maybe the saddest, was the reactions of our fellow Americans which showed their true colors.

Overall, a really funny movie, as well as a sad commentary of our US and A.

By the way, I like Jack Black and all, but his Tenacious D flick looks really dumb and not funny AT ALL. I plan to never see it.

Cranberry Sauced!

Well, it's turkey day. Not a huge turkey fan, but I like the tradition. My two favorite things about T-Day are the stuffing and cranberry sauce. I'm pretty much the only one at the table who eats the cranberry sauce, and that's fine by me. But I don't eat the lumpy shit. It's gotta be the jellied kind, and it must be shaped like the can.

Be safe.

Robert Altman RIP

Well, we lost a good director yesterday. Robert Altman was never one of my faves, actually I think many of him films were way overrated, but the guy obviously had a ton of talent, was a huge influence on many of today's up & coming directors, and he'll be missed.

The Stand-In

This is my latest script and the one my manager is fully behind. I'm through the 1st act and swimming nicely into Act Dos. It's very mainstream, high concept stuff. I'll post some excerpts soon.

It's about a former high school loser who hires a male supermodel to attend his high school reunion posing as the former loser. That's only the jumping off point, the reunion stuff ends by the end of Act 1.

Not groundbreaking stuff, but it's a fun concept. I wrote the beginning 10 pages about 6 years ago actually and just let it sit there. Then a few months back I was pitching some completed scripts & works in progress to my new manager. As he shot them down one by one (he's Mr. Mainstream-High-Concept, which is cool, but I've got more of an independent film mindset/fuck-the-3-act-structure way of thinking typically) I then pitched him this and he loved it. Easy to pitch, and if you're a Studio Exec you can "see" the movie, that was his point, and it's true. I am rather sick of working my useless 9-5, so I'll gladly get this puppy on its feet.

As for other stuff, we're waiting on feedback from sending out Food Fight (feature script). It's been in some pretty important hands over the last month, from agencies to prod. companies, so we'll see how that goes down.

Cricket Hill is awaiting word from our director. He's been extremely busy of late (just finished re-shoots for his next film (The Chaos Theory, starring Ryan Reynolds) and is in the middle of directing an episode of The Nine).

That's all I got for now! Gotta get back to Act 2!

C'MON PEOPLE

Ever since I started bloggin about 1 year ago, I noticed something about a handful of my fellow bloggers.

Well, some of you....have QUIT. What the fuck, man? How long do you think this takes?

It's strange, I mean, coming into this, you had to know it might not be EASY to sell a screenplay. It's usually a long damn road. And a road that sucks ass most of the time. Filled with MANY disappointments and dickheaded producers.

But don't give up! Christ!

I've seen it - they'll write one script, maybe 2, and try to get some action on it. And some do, but when it ends up not panning out, they pack it in. Oh, well, gave that a shot, let's go work at Target.

People - this is a hard career. I've been at it full-time (other than the day job) for a good 7-8 years now. And I still have the day job. Sure, I've had minor successes here and there, but even now, none of the projects I have out there in development are "sold" and they could just as easily fall apart. And if they do, will I quit? Well, fucking hell, no. It'll piss me off, sure. But I'll try again. And again.

So you wrote a script that didn't sell. Write another one. That one not sell either? Then write another one. Or re-write the 1st one. Or go make it your damn self.

You will be disappointed. You will be pissed. You will be in tears. Frustrated. Blocked. Did I mention disappointed? And all the while you better be blogging about it, cause we all go through it, and it sucks, but we move on, we get over it, and we fucking write. Cause we love it.

But quitting? Not. An. Option.

My Way-Too Early Predictions....

Back in March I decided to predict the Oscars of 2006. Here were my choices for Best Picture.......

Flags Of Our Fathers
Dreamgirls
Running With Scissors
Marie Antoinette
The Good Shepard

I wasn't nuts for thinking of those at the time (without seeing them, reading them, etc). Flags might still make it, and Dreamgirls seems like a shoo-in. Running with Scissors? Won't make it, but might get Annette Bening a Best Actree Nom (it seems all will lose to Helen Mirren anyway). Marie won't make it in for anything at this point. And we'll see how the Good Shepard plays out. My prediction that Eddie Murphy will get a nomination for supporting will likely come true.

My other pics that might get a best pic nomination if the ones listed above didn't all make it were The Departed (now of course, it's a no-brainer), All The King's Men (Ha!), The Fountain (too "out there" to get a nom), The Prestige (maybe a screenplay nomination), Zodiac (moved to 2007), Breaking & Entering (not sure about this one yet), and Stranger Than Fiction (doubtful).

Hey, it was March, and I was bored! What do you guys think?

Back from Vaca

Well, I'm back. We hit Florida for a week, did the Disney thing (again, we went for Easter) and hit a few other things. We basically covered what we missed last time in Disney - it's still the same, plastic perfection. I still think they need to update the Magic Kingdom. Their Carousel Of "Progress" is a joke, and the marionette-type of puppets just don't cut it.

We also hit Medieval times (very cool) and Wonderworks (magicians, comedy, etc - neat place). Gatorland was in flames when we arrived so that was out, so we went to Silver Springs. An okay place but it's basically run by Grandparents - Nice joint with some good views of gators & shit, but it needed some life! You could hear a pin drop. Our "captain" who rode us around in their famous glass-bottom boats said he'd worked their for 100 years - I believed him.

We also stayed at the Nick Hotel for a night - 100x better than a Disney hotel stay. When I walked into our suite and saw the very large flat-screen TV on the living room wall, they had me.

Finally, South Of The Border. Bomb it. Just get rid of the thing. I used to think its retro-look made it a cool place. Now I realize it's just a dirty, filthy abomination run by Guttertrash. Couldn't even attept to eat at any of their restaurants, they all stunk of piss and cancer.

Anyway, the family had a good time. I think my wife only threatened to kill me 3-4 times (I likely deserved it) and I believe I only threatened my oldest son with leaving him by the side of the road twice. Good times!

Now, back to work.

Savage!

What ever happened to Savage Steve Holland, director of the classic 80s John Cusack epics One Crazy Summer & Better Off Dead? Well, look no further than Nickolodeon. I got a chuckle when we were watching (with the kids, silly) Ned's Declassified (it's actually a smart, funny show) and his name pop up as director. Savage Steve rocks!

How Silly Can you Get?

What movie features the above-mentioned song? Winner gets a cookie.

Nothing new on the writing front. Cricket Hill (TV Show Pilot) is still out to the director's agents, awaiting word on our next step. These things take time, lots of it.

Food Fight (Feature) has seen the rounds, and is still seeing more rounds. No one has bit yet. C'mon, people, bite!

With all my new writing ideas that I wanted to start work on, I froze up and couldn't really focus on any of them. so I switched gears and went back to re-write a 7 year old script (one of my better ones from that era), gave it a new title and voila! I love it all over again. I'll send it out to the manager this weekend and see what he thinks.

Ain't seen crap at the movies, but I'd like to see The Departed, The Prestige and The Borat. But Borat's release was slimmed down (I heard it'll go out on 800 screens). With the buzz this was getting, I thought a wider release would have been smarter. Then again, I'm still a home inspector so what do I know. Deja Vu doesn't look like anything special, I'll wait for HBO.

Saw American Dreamz. It stank. Slow and NOT very edgy. Had a moment or two, and the performances were good, but the script stunk like a beer shit. Deja Vu doesn't look like anything special, I'll wait for HBO.

Weeds - Now that was a finale. Balls to the wall fun, tension, and great drama. A highlight was when the youngest son, while giving his speech as he's graduating INTO Junior High, lashes out at the clueless parents/teachers, etc and exclaims "There are motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane." Brilliant. Can't wait 'til next season.

Kerry Vs. Dumb Republicans

Leave the dude alone. He screwed up the punchline to a lame joke. So? Fucking Republicans have to jump all over him now. HE HATES THE TROOPS! HE HAS NO RESPECT FOR YOUR DYING SONS IN IRAQ! HE EATS KITTENS!

Should we count the times Bush said something that came out wrong? It's only every time he opens his mouth, I just take it with a grain of salt. You don't want to agree with/like Kerry? Fine, don't. But don't use this idiotic non-story as your reason.

I'm not Mr. Political here, so I'll keep this short. But we're in a god-awful mess "over there." This isn't news, I know, but it's ugly and Kerry knows that and if anything, he wants our troops HOME. Now. Because he's actually been in a war.

Kerry might not have been the perfect candidate, but he was a great alternative and I sure as hell voted for him.

But don't worry, Bush's people said Iraq's government should be able to take over in about a year-and-a-half. Funny thing though, that's what they said last year.

Uno!

Holy crap, I'm one! That's some crazy-ass shite. This very blog has been on the airwaves (internet waves?) for 1 whole year.

What do I do? Throw myself a party? Pour myself a cold one? Grab a crack-whore? They're always good for a laugh.

Well, it's been an interesting year. Ups & downs, all that stuff. Workwise, well I still have a job so I guess that's good. Family-wise things have never been better. And script-wise? Well, I'm still plugging away, and with the new manager and option this year, things are looking good for the future.

Unless the option doesn't go anywhere.
Unless the manager can't get any scripts sold/packaged.

Either way, at this time next year, whether I'm wiping my ass with a $20 because I've sold a million dollar script or still hard at work inspecting these god-damn motherfucking houses, well, I'll be right here, blogging like a dork, eagerly awaiting your comments.

I'll show you the life of the mind

Random quote above, has nothing to do with my post.

I thought Kenny Rogers was gonna bitch slap Todd Jones. I'm still thinking Detroit in 6. Wish the Phils were in it though.

I checked out Thank you For Smoking finally. It was good. Didn't blow me away but it was very well done. Eckhart ruled. Lots of catcthing up to do with DVD watching. We've got The King, Inside Man, Art School Confidential and Friends With Money to watch next...if only there weren't so many decent TV shows on this year! Still loving Jericho, Weeds & The Office. The 9 is good but I see it getting canceled (the ratings are dropping like a stone. Same with the fine Studio 60). And I'm still on-board with Lost. The season has gotten off to a good start. Oh, and Help Me Help you is actually pretty funny.

Check out Sam's Town by The Killers. At first listen I wasn't too thrilled by it, but after repeated plays it's growing on me.

As for my script-writing - I'm all over the place. I thought I had pinned down my next script to actually focus on, and I kinda have, but I've come up with 2 more kick-ass ideas sicne my last post, and habve decided to go back and work on a drama I started last year....which you guys can help me with - The title. Here's the jist of it - it's a dark family drama, dealing with drug abuse & murder. My original title was Pearl River, but I don't want it to be seen as a Mystic River rip so I'm not 100% on it. Alternate titles are The People Down The Street and The Rest Of Us.

Thoughts? How do you feel about these titles? Have any other title ideas?

Finally.......

Phew, I'm finally back & writing. Okay, it hasn't been too long, but it's been over a month since I've been able to focus one actually get a script moving forward. Staring at the screen and adding a sentence every other night doesn't quite get the job done.

I've been talking about the variety of scripts I'm working on, without working on much. I've got 4 right now on my plate (I've mentioned them before - Titan, The Stand-In, Westville and Open House).

Open House is the one I'll be finishing first. I'm going to try to complete it by 10/31. I'm a bit further with Westville but my thoughts of Open House are keeping me inspired to write it and get it out there. It'll pretty much shake up the real estate community if it ever got made. Let's just say it doesn't show them (real estate agents) in a nice light. And most of them deserve it. I've only met a handful that are actually smart, decent people. And the others? Well, they won't like Open House, and that's fine by me.

Song of the Week (tie) - Knights Of Cydonia (Muse) & Alone, Jealous & Stoned (Secret Machines)

Detroit in 6

The A's never had a chance. And neither does the National League. If the Cards get to the World Series, and I think they will since the Mets' pitching blows (if only Glavine could pitch every night, he rocks!) then they're the only team that could make it sorta interesting, although I think Detroit would take them in 6 games. If the Mets do happen to make it, then Detroit will win in 5 games.

Random Shizzle

TV - Lost had a nice premiere, good start to Season 3. The Nine was decent, but I wouldn't go seeking it out if it wasn't on after Lost. I'm still on-board for Jericho, I'm curious to see where they go with it. Smith is cancelled, which surpised me. So much for nurturing shows with possibility.

The Office is still the best thing on TV. The Call Of Duty stuff was priceless.

MUSIC - Listening to the new Killers cd, plus the new Youth Group album (which is amazing). Might check out the Secret Machines Saturday night.

MOVIES - Only thing I've seen is Open Season. Nothing new but not an awful movie, had some moments, one of which including shit pellets flying out of Ashton Kutcher's deer-ass.

WRITING - Currently awaiting the next step for my TV Pilot Cricket Hill. My feature script FOOD FIGHT was read recently by a pretty damn big producer of comedies, so we're awaiting his thoughts.

As for new scripts, I'm working on my real estate comedy called Open House, plus my comedy Westville, and I recently started my first drama in a long time - it's a high school drama called Titan. If I had to compare it to anything, you'd think Elephant (similiar one word title, although the name of the high school football team in my script is the Titans). Plus, although Elephant was an interesting movie, it didn't capture one ounce of what a real high school is.

Now I'm gonna crank up some tunes and hit the Final Draft......

Late!

Stealing Home By Aaron Coffman

Aaron Coffman was kind enough to send me his short film, Stealing Home. I've been following his blog for a while now, and always thought through his stills & trailer that this movie looked pretty good. But, of course, the entire film could have sucked balls.

Well, it didn't. At all.

My review Of Stealing Home:

If I could describe it in one word I'd say "excellent." This is a fine, fine film. And I say film because, well, it was actually made on FILM. And it's a beautiful thing to see. God, I miss it. My last handful of projects have all been DV, and while DV is okay to use it simply does not compare. There is a beauty and quality to film that can't be topped.

The script - The story is about a mother & son trying to connect after a divorce. The script itself is good, Aaron uses minimal dialogue throughout, but what's most important is what's NOT being said. What these characters are feeling is the focus, and he really captured that. I went through a divorce myself, although I was 9 (months) old when it happened in my situation, the point is the aftermath is brutal, terrifying, and life shattering. Although this movie takes place after the divorce, you can see it's lasting effect on the son.

Sound - Was decent. A few minor sound problems, nothing that took me out of the film.

Direction - Perfect. The shots were solid, and not wasted. What I really liked was how Aaron kept the camera moving. Too many movies rely on boring/uninteresting static shots. But he wasn't moving it just the the hell of it either. The performances were top notch. Very natural. And the kid who played the son, Grady, (Mark Asser) was great, I've worked with plenty of kids who were not, let's just say, camera-ready. This kid was natural and he seemed to really nail the character and the emotions. Dad was good in a small role, and Mom (Libby Bibb) was excellent. All around, a well-casted movie. And this type of movie needed a solid cast who understood the material. They nailed it. Kudos to Aaron for getting these performances.

Cinematography - Well, like I said, I loved the look of it. But the lighting (both interiors & exteriors) also looked great. The colors really stood out, and the framing was perfect.

Pacing - Just a note that this flew by. It's a little over 15 minutes long, but I've seen plenty of shorts that feel like 3 hours. Not this. Like I said, not a shot was wasted.

Love to see a feature of this. I think the possibility is there, expanding the story/characters, etc. There's a ton of material here. It's nice & refreshing to see a filmmaker out there with some actual talent, even if he is from St. Louis.

Congrats, Aaron. Keep us posted!

Check out Aaron's website/blog here.
Check out Aaron's myspace page here.

Murph!

Eddie's back. Always loved Eddie Murphy, although of late he's been stuck in Doolittle/Haunted Mansion/Day Care type of crap. BUT, those movies made some moola, and I'm sure he made them for his kids, so you can't really blame the guy. Good news though, he's back in the type of role he shines in, a kick-ass looking comedy called NORBIT. Last awesome role he had was Bowfinger, one of my favorite comedies ever. Check out the Norbit traler from the movie's website. Funny shit!

The Screenplay Agency = Jerkoffs

Look, it's not bad enough that this silly lil' industry is close to impossible to break into, especially if you live in say, oh, New Jersey. But all we need are some scam artists out there trying to rape us of our money.

John August had a recent post about The Screenplay Agency, and Warren also did a nice series on them. Just throwing my 2 cents in....They are useless assholes. An open sore on the ass of life.

Here's what they do. Now, I've never dealt with them, but a buddy of mine did. He had sent out some query letters, they were one that he contacted. He didn't know at the time that they were the dickbags that they are.

They said they'd like to read his script. Said they loved his script, but they wanted to have it analyzed, blah, blah, fucking blah. I believe it was for 100 smackers for an editor to analyze it. He called me and told me about it, I told him to get outta there like a Ryan Howard home run. And he did, and the cocksuckers over at The Screenplay Agency didn't get squat from him. Ah-ha.

Thing is, they are out there, ripping off mainly rookie screenwriters, who just don't know any better. All we want to do is write, you know? And they've got the nerve to try to rip off what little money we've got? How dare they. They are useless scammers. They will get you nowhere and I guarantee that they've sold or optioned NOTHING. Even their website looks cheap. Dirty pricks.

So, if you are ever contacted by The Screenplay Agency you need to do the following 3 things:

1. Tell them to go fuck themselves.
2. Explain how evil and heartless their company is.
3. Tell them to fuck themselves again.(It's important to get this point across).

Anyone ever come across these wastes-of-life?

#43

Well, Zucker is el completo. Just finished a nice polish of it, thanks to some killer notes from Mr. Scott The Reader. 109 Pages of pure comedy genius. now I'll send it over the Mr. Manager and see what he thinks about it. I loved writing it, and I think it kicks all sorts of ass. Took a while to do it, about 8 months, but I took off about 4-5 months in the middle of Zucker to work on the Cricket Hill TV pilot and Food Fight.

Right now, Food Fight is out to producers (we're hitting a biggie this week, not a producer per se, they're more considered a studio). Fingers crossed! And Cricket Hill is out to agents.

So, Zucker is officially my 43rd feature-length script ever written. Yeah, it's a lot. But those first several are simply unreadable. Some of the others have their moments, but are structurally unsound. The scripts I've written since 1999 are pretty damn good I'd say, with the last 3 years being pretty solid. Some highlights:

**Lost & Found (1997) - First script ever written.....Worst script ever written.
**Stain (1997) - Pretty gritty, it's about street hustlers. I directed & co-produced. My research? Nada. We turned it into an okay low-budgeet shot-on-crap-DV movie.
**Good People (1998) - My 1st option, story by my wife.
**The Adventures Of Riley - My first script to win/place at some competitions. Always loved riley, might go back to it one day.
**The Go Getters (1998) Basically Freaks & Geeks, although mine came first, dammit! My longest script ever, this high school drama came in at a hefty 145 pages. And I didn't cut any! Not a one!
**The Money Shot (1999) - Porn + college = 2nd Option!
**A Couple Of Joes (1999) 3rd Option.
**Better Days (2001) - Basically The Last Kiss. Self-produced & directed.
**West River Drive (2002) - Another self-produced (and directed) low budget epic.
**Cricket Hill (2nd Place Comedy, Austin, 2003) - Great things have come from this script. Praying that even grater things will come soon. In development as a TV Pilot/series.

Out of 43, how many are worthy? Hmm. I'd say 15 would be ready to read at this moment, with another 10 needing a hard polish. Throw in another 10 that would need real work. Another 10 are likely train wrecks.

t v land

Well, Fall TV is off and running. And actually looks pretty good so far.

LOVED LOVED LOVED the pilot for Studio 60. It's actually one of the best pilots I've seen. Perfect set up, great characters, sharp writing. I just hope people watch it. They might not be interested in a behind-the-scenes of a TV sketch show, but hopefully they'll tune in. Special nod to Matthew Perry. The whole cast is great, but he nailed it.

Kidnapped is bascially Ransom, or at least Ransom-ish. It's even got Delroy! But that's a good thing for the show. It wasn't as bad as it should have been. I am a bit curious to see where they'll go with it, so it's my guilty pleasure, although if it never came on again I wouldn't miss it.

Jericho was a pleasant surprise. It was a solid pilot, a bit creepy actually, since you could picture this going down in "real" life unfortunately. I'd tune in again to see where it goes.

Stand-Off is a smart show. Love the chemistry, although my concern would be having a stand-off/hostage situation EVERY week might get old. We'll see how the whole season unfolds.

Justice - not bad for yet another lawyer show. It's got a nice cast, decent writing so far, I'll tune in again.

Nip/Tuck - Sucks. I was a fan of this show, but last year was disjointed, and this year is already sucking pretty hard. It's like the writers are just throwing ideas up on a wall for the hell of it. I'll tune in for 1 or 2 more episodes, but if it doesn't improve, I'm bailing.

Shark - not going to watch it. I just can't.

Looking forward to 30 Rock, and am curious about The 9. Not sure about 6 degrees, and am pretty sure Heroes won't make it to the mid season.

As for returning shows, It's all about The Office in our house. Great show, funniest on TV. Weeds, too. Weeds is off to a great start this season, can't wait for the next episode.

Animated Flix

Now this looks like Suess. Blue Sky Studios (Robots, Ice Age) nailed it, at least from these pics from Horton Hears A Who.

It used to be cool when some animated epic came out, like A Bug's Life, then next year another one would come out. Now, they're all over the place. Over the Summer, we actually had a three week span when 3 new animated movies came out - Monster House, Ant Bully, and Barnyard. They all pretty much sank, especially Bully. Monster made the most (of those 3) but I'm sure their budget was enormous. And Barnyard did okay. Cars is the animated king of the Summer (240+ million) followed by Over the Hedge (around 150 million) which is cool. I enjoyed them both.

This week we have Everyone's Hero. Every time I see that damn commercial I wanna put me head through a wall. Or at least slit my wrists. "I GOTTA GET BABY'S BAT BACK!" It's BABE Ruth, you asshole kid! Then we'll have Open Season. Then Flushed Away. Hopefully the better of these won't get lost (leaning towards Flushed Away as the "better."

Which also brings me to my theory I blogged about before that someone is ripping off someone. We've got Flushed Away, about rats. Then next summer we have Pixar's Ratatouille. About rats. Years ago we had the Bug's Life/Antz showdown. And don't forget Shrek & Monster's Inc came out the same year (both monster heroes, work with me). And who could forget Finding Nemo & Shark Tale (adventures of sea life). Or Madagascar/The Wild. Or Robots & Cars (both metal...okay, I'm reaching).

Anyhoo, what's your favorite animated movie? Mine would be the Iron Giant, by Brad Bird, who also directed the excellent Incredibles. I also enjoyed Toy Story, A Bug's Life, Shrek (1), and Ice Age. And if you can find it, there's this animated film from England called When The Wind Blows about the aftermath of a nuclear war. Haunting, amazing.

So, what's your fave?

Later on, Luc

So, Luc Besson is done. He has directed his last movie, his 10th. Interesting, can't he just take a break? He's gotta pack it in? Well, good luck to him. His movies were hit and miss. His best being The Professional (Leon) (Yeah, I liked it better than Nikita), and his most horrible creation was, in my opinion, The 5th Element - great trailer, by the way, I remember being blown away when I saw the trailer, but the movie was a travesty. An absolute mess. One of my least favorite movies, ever.

Anyhoo, as far as I know, he's calling it quits. Maybe he'll be back, and I'm not sure if he'll still be producing, maybe he'll keep at that. But for now, later on, Luc.

Hey, I wrote that, Beeyotch!

Ever see something either "coming soon" or listed in Variety, and it's basically the same shit you've been working on? Mr. Robby Hogan ran into this recently, and it has pissed in my face once again.

First of all, back in 1998 I made a short called The Family Dog. Had minor sucesses online at places like ifilm, atom & some other sites. It was about a guy who was meeting his girlfriend's parents for the 1st time. Even had an overflowing toilet.

Also in 1998 I wrote a script called Superhero Blues, which was a script with superheroes, but wacky! Soon after Mystery Men came out (bombed). Although my script did get into their personal lives more, one of them was divorced, one was a single guy, etc, their tome was similar.

In 1999 I wrote a script called The Go Getters about a group of geeky high school boys trying to get by through fresman year. You could say it had freaks & geeks in it.

I wrote a script called The Pirates Of Pissbottom two years before POTC (Part 1) came out.

Oh, and I can't forget my mob comedy about an outside-type who falls for a girl who doesn't know her family is in the mob (Mickey Blue Eyes, anyone?)

In 2001, I wrote & directed a short film called The Reappearance of Homer Pitts, about a boy who felt left out, bullied, and neglected, and thuse, turns invisible. When he realizes he is loved and missed by his family/friends, he reappears. Now, coming later this year? The Invisible! About a boy who........Get the picture?

Oh, and I can't forget about the script I wrote called There Goes Ruby Fields, about a wedding crasher who meets the girl of his dreams at a wedding he crashes.

Not that these scripts/stories are all that original, but it sucks to work on something and then see it come out first, pretty much deflating your idea.

Thank god I've got a better manager now, so hopefully I can actually get my work seen before somebody else freakin' thinks of the same idea.

This shit ever happen to you?

Hi Skool Flix

The latest EW has put together a list of the best high school movies. A top 50, no less. 50? That's a lot of damn high school movies. I think they should have went for Top 20, because the pickings get slim. Their #1 is The Breakfast Club. Could not agree more. One of my faves of all time. It most definetely captures high school. The confusion. Anxiety. Joy. And the weight of it. After that, the list gets shaky....especially putting 16 Candles at #49.

But there's plenty that should not be on there at all, in my opinion. Harry Potter/Goblet Of Fire? (#36, ahead of 16 Candles!). That's a HIGH SCHOOL movie? C'mon, I swore that was about magic (at a SCHOOL OF MAGIC). Do they have a football team? German Club? A Prom? A Morp?

And Back To The Future? (#28). In my opinion, I'd say that was about time traveling. I'll give them Friday Night Lights (#37), although any high school scenes in that movie were limited to montages of football players walking down a hallway. And I think the focus of that movie is football. On Friday night. With lights.

They did score with a bunch. Fast Times. Dazed & Confused. Heathers. Clueless. Say Anything. American Pie. Election. Rushmore. Brick. Here would be my list:

1. The Breakfast Club
2. Ferris Bueller
3. Say Anything
4. 16 Candles
5. Rushmore
6. Three O'Clock High
7. The Last American Virgin
8. Dazed & Confused
9. Election
10.Heathers

Also, two recent movies, Chumscrubber & Thumbsucker are growing on me and might someday may a list of this sort.

They also have Donnie Darko on their list, which is okay and it makes sense, but let me just say something about that movie........it's way overrated. Don't get me wrong, it's got some great moments in it, but it just doesn't hold together for me. And think about it, where would it be without the haunting "Mad World" cover at the end of it.

Anyway, what are some of your faves?

Idiotic Sequels

First, thanks for the replies/suggestions on Headshot. Good stuff there, lots to think on. I honestly like the story as it unfolds, but see that the logline needs revamping first of all. I know in my logline & synopsis, it's mostly about the Extra/Killer, and I need to make sure I bring the Screenwriter (Our Hero) more in focus.

And now, these direct-to-dvd pieces of shit that basically piss all over the original movies, although most were garbage to begin with. I'm talking about that Roadhouse 2. 8mm 2 (Both with Jonathon "Where The Hell Did My Career Go?" Schaech). I also heard there's gonna be a Cutting Edge 2 (What the hell is the point?? It's got basically NO name recognition with the original ice skating epic!!).

Also: Legally Blonde 3, Into the Blue 2, Wargames 2 (actually a remake would be a better idea I think), Species 4. And I know there's another I Know What You Did Last Summer coming, I think it's called: I'M POSITIVE THAT YOU MAY HAVE DONE SOMETHING NEGATIVE IN THE RECENT PAST THAT YOU SHALL BE KILLED FOR.

Disney morons were guilty of this before the Pixar merger. They had Bambi 2, Cinderella 2 The Revenge, Leroy (!) and Stitch, and recently another Brother Bear, and of course their Alladins & Lion Kings 3.5 or whatever.

At least Disney seems to be stopping the madness after BB2, but are these other shit-flicks necessary? Will you really go out and rent 8mm 2? The first one bombed, remember? How could Part 2 possibly make any money? Christ, and all of us are out here still struggling with all these "ideas" coming out of Hollywood?

Assist Me Please!

Help me here. What's wrong with this script? Not the logline so much, 'cause people have requested it after reading it:

The cast and crew of an independent film production have more to worry about than the budget when a psychotic extra snaps and begins killing them off.

My basis of the script was dealing with an annoying extra on my own movie, called WAIT A MINUTE, the we made a trailer for 3+ years ago. After that, he would NOT stop bothering me. condtasntly asking if the trailer was finished, over, and over. The dude was BARELY in it (he was in a crowded dance club scene). If he's lucky, his shoulder might be glimpsed in a nano-second long shot. That's another post though - Extras.

So, the script is called HEADSHOT. Basically, as the premise suggests, an actor lands a gig as an extra on a small movie, but this guy is the most annoying person on Earth, gets on everyone's nerves, fucks up shots/scenes, etc. So he gets fired and bascially kills most of the cast & crew in his crazed revenge.

Now, it's not straight horror. It's really 75% comedy, 25% horror I'd say.
People have read the script, and their main concern is that we know who the killer is (his name is Dagnus Todd). SO? I mean, my point is NOT who the killer is, we know the guy is nutso at the beginning, I feel that the entertainment of the story is how/when he's going to snap, and who's going to survive. Nightmare on Elm St, Friday The 13th, Halloween, Chucky, etc - We know the killer.

Thoughts/reflections on this?

Worst TV Show Ever?

Cool Band to listen to: YOUTH GROUP
Cool Movie now on cable: THE BAXTER
Cool Baseball Team to Cheer for: The Phils (be even better if they had some decent relief)

Now the reason for this post.......

I was thinking about some of the cool shows I watch nowadays (when Spongebob or Fairly Oddparents aren't clogging the TV). Entourage. Scrubs. Lost. The Office. And I'm happy that my guilty pleasure (What About Brian?) is returning. And I'm looking forward to some of the new stuff, like Studio 60 & 30 Rock. But it got me thinking back to stuff I used to watch, stuff like Miami Vice (yeah, it's dated, but it rocked), Cheers, and I loved that 'Nam show Tour Of Duty. The A-Team. Knight Rider. The Dukes!

But what show did I despise?? What did I hate hate hate? Only one show comes to mind. No, not Blossom, although Mayim or however you spell her name did get under my skin. And there are plenty of other lame comedies or boring dramas that leave a stench. But the one show that made me want to swallow a lit stick of dynamite was..(drumroll)..Small Wonder.

Oh my God how I wanted her to malfunction. Forever!

What's your worst TV show EVER?