Hello all (E.C.?!) hope you're doing well!!
Still writing. My best script, the Accidents, is still floating about, hoping for someone to realize its awesomeness.
Working on a few other ideas and scripts. Work/life has gotten in the way of some of these ideas/scripts, but I work on them when I can.
And I was hired to write a fun, raunchy script, now called All-American Bikini Car Wash, which was shot, and it now being edited. Should be released at the end of 2014/early 2015. I'll post photos and links soon.
Sunday, July 13, 2014
Friday, November 01, 2013
Hi.
So, what's up with y'all. Are we still blogging? I don't know. At my current rate I do it twice a year (and it's been 1.5 years since my last post). I guess it's easier to slap something down on Twitter or The Facebook.
Let's see what's new since I last did this. Raised my kids some more. Saw some movies. Took some photographs. And I wrote. Tweaked my script, The Accidents, which landed in Nicholl as a quarterfinalist, which is cool. Got some requests for it, so I'm waiting to hear back on those.
Had two scripts optioned. I'm re-writing one of those as soon as I receive notes. The other, I dunno, not looking good. I was hired to write a new script which I'm in the middle of, which is a cool thing.
I have a few others that I'd LOVE to write, but I really need to get this one done first. And I have 16 different stories I'd like to turn into novels, but with zero time to even think about starting any of those. As it is, I have one completed novel collecting bytes in my computer, and 3 others that are started. Boo.
Okay, back to my script!
Let's see what's new since I last did this. Raised my kids some more. Saw some movies. Took some photographs. And I wrote. Tweaked my script, The Accidents, which landed in Nicholl as a quarterfinalist, which is cool. Got some requests for it, so I'm waiting to hear back on those.
Had two scripts optioned. I'm re-writing one of those as soon as I receive notes. The other, I dunno, not looking good. I was hired to write a new script which I'm in the middle of, which is a cool thing.
I have a few others that I'd LOVE to write, but I really need to get this one done first. And I have 16 different stories I'd like to turn into novels, but with zero time to even think about starting any of those. As it is, I have one completed novel collecting bytes in my computer, and 3 others that are started. Boo.
Okay, back to my script!
Thursday, July 19, 2012
Fuck, I last posted a year and a half ago?
Sorry about that. I really wanted to post more. Okay, clean slate. I'll post more.
No seriously. You just watch. EC Henry - You still alive?
Okay, quick writing update before I crash tonight.
The Accidents - Done, finished it, oh, several months ago. Didn't do much with it afterwards. Meant to enter it into Austin & Nichol but my feet dragging got the best of me and the deadlines passed. Got some feedback, however, from Bluecat (I entered their 2013 contest, but when you enter early you get feedback returned quickly). I liked what their two readers had to say, and they had some good notes for me that I plan on implementing to improve it, so maybe it's good that I waited before sending the thing out to more places/people.
Novels - I really want to complete another. I like Surviving Edwards Avenue, my first novel, although it's currently collecting pixels in my computer. Sent bunches of queries out, got a bunch of fuck yous in reply. That's fine. Fuck you, too. There is a plan in the works to rework it a bit, change it up some. We'll see.
More scripts? Started & stopped a few. I just can't wrap my head around writing as much as I used to. Hell, I used to pump out screenplays many moons ago, a few per year. What happened? A mid-life crisis kinda deal? Fuck, who knows. I still enjoy writing. Is it the 40 year old malaise (this started a couple years ago, however, so I can blame turning 4-0 all I want, but the truth is my writing has trailed off). I must change this. All I know is that I want to write more, I have gallons of ideas all the time. Dialogue still comes to me at random moments during the day, ideas, scenes, all that shit. And then I sit down to write and it evaporates. I do not know. I have some started, we'll see if I can keep them going.
Had a few close calls with agents/producers. A few requested some scripts, sent them out, some said "nope, sorry writer" in their usual, generic kiss-off, and a few said nothing at all, which is the same as "nope, sorry writerguy. Also, if you have a day job, don't quit it. And if you don't have a day job, get one." Perhaps I'm reading into things too much.
Anyway, I am currently in talks with a producer to possibly have one of my scripts produced. I realize it could all disintegrate by the time I end this sentence, so while 10+ years ago I would get all excited at the prospect of a potential script sale/option, the reality of life has taught me to not really give a shit, so I don't give one. Still, it'd be nice....
No seriously. You just watch. EC Henry - You still alive?
Okay, quick writing update before I crash tonight.
The Accidents - Done, finished it, oh, several months ago. Didn't do much with it afterwards. Meant to enter it into Austin & Nichol but my feet dragging got the best of me and the deadlines passed. Got some feedback, however, from Bluecat (I entered their 2013 contest, but when you enter early you get feedback returned quickly). I liked what their two readers had to say, and they had some good notes for me that I plan on implementing to improve it, so maybe it's good that I waited before sending the thing out to more places/people.
Novels - I really want to complete another. I like Surviving Edwards Avenue, my first novel, although it's currently collecting pixels in my computer. Sent bunches of queries out, got a bunch of fuck yous in reply. That's fine. Fuck you, too. There is a plan in the works to rework it a bit, change it up some. We'll see.
More scripts? Started & stopped a few. I just can't wrap my head around writing as much as I used to. Hell, I used to pump out screenplays many moons ago, a few per year. What happened? A mid-life crisis kinda deal? Fuck, who knows. I still enjoy writing. Is it the 40 year old malaise (this started a couple years ago, however, so I can blame turning 4-0 all I want, but the truth is my writing has trailed off). I must change this. All I know is that I want to write more, I have gallons of ideas all the time. Dialogue still comes to me at random moments during the day, ideas, scenes, all that shit. And then I sit down to write and it evaporates. I do not know. I have some started, we'll see if I can keep them going.
Had a few close calls with agents/producers. A few requested some scripts, sent them out, some said "nope, sorry writer" in their usual, generic kiss-off, and a few said nothing at all, which is the same as "nope, sorry writerguy. Also, if you have a day job, don't quit it. And if you don't have a day job, get one." Perhaps I'm reading into things too much.
Anyway, I am currently in talks with a producer to possibly have one of my scripts produced. I realize it could all disintegrate by the time I end this sentence, so while 10+ years ago I would get all excited at the prospect of a potential script sale/option, the reality of life has taught me to not really give a shit, so I don't give one. Still, it'd be nice....
Monday, February 07, 2011
Writin' Like A Mofo
Been a while since I've actually written much - anything - in this blog. Does anyone read these still? I dunno. But a quick update for the 2 or 3 people that might come across this, even if by accident.
I'm writing again. A lot. Maybe I was blocked, I don't know. I wanted to write, but I couldn't. Well, that's over. Here's what I'm working on:
The Accidents - This is the only screenplay I'm working on at the moment, and I think it's the ONE. I know, I know, I've said it before, but it really feels like it this time. Usually, I'll have a great start and get through Act 1 when the Act 2 blahs set in and my mind will wander elsewhere. Not this time, I'm approaching page 70 and going strong. Hopefully I'll finish it this week.
Westville - I started it as a screenplay (before the Act 2 blahs set in...see what I mean!) but it feels better now that I've started turning it into a novel. I did it with Surviving Edwards Avenue, another screenplay that I adapted into a novel last year.
Surviving Edwards Avenue - As far as I'm concerned, it's done, and in pretty good shape. I like it a lot. Been sending query letters out to agents to see if they bite. Now, just hoping for a bite.
Memoir - I've had a bunch of starts & stops with this one. Every time I think it's ready I start writing, and then I realize it's not ready.
Zombie, NJ - My horror-comedy novel. I wrote the screenplay in 2009, thought it was a cool, fun romp, so I decided to adapt it into a novel also. I've got the first few chapters done and like it so far. It's not high on the priority list of things to write/work on, but I return to it from time to time.
Hopefully, at least one of these will be finished soon.
I'm writing again. A lot. Maybe I was blocked, I don't know. I wanted to write, but I couldn't. Well, that's over. Here's what I'm working on:
The Accidents - This is the only screenplay I'm working on at the moment, and I think it's the ONE. I know, I know, I've said it before, but it really feels like it this time. Usually, I'll have a great start and get through Act 1 when the Act 2 blahs set in and my mind will wander elsewhere. Not this time, I'm approaching page 70 and going strong. Hopefully I'll finish it this week.
Westville - I started it as a screenplay (before the Act 2 blahs set in...see what I mean!) but it feels better now that I've started turning it into a novel. I did it with Surviving Edwards Avenue, another screenplay that I adapted into a novel last year.
Surviving Edwards Avenue - As far as I'm concerned, it's done, and in pretty good shape. I like it a lot. Been sending query letters out to agents to see if they bite. Now, just hoping for a bite.
Memoir - I've had a bunch of starts & stops with this one. Every time I think it's ready I start writing, and then I realize it's not ready.
Zombie, NJ - My horror-comedy novel. I wrote the screenplay in 2009, thought it was a cool, fun romp, so I decided to adapt it into a novel also. I've got the first few chapters done and like it so far. It's not high on the priority list of things to write/work on, but I return to it from time to time.
Hopefully, at least one of these will be finished soon.
Wednesday, December 01, 2010
The Kids Are All Right
I read a recent article in Philadelphia Magazine (Dec.) that brought up some interesting points regarding the kids of today. Basically blamed Facebook, Twitter, Ipods, etc, for creating a generation of idiots. While I agree that there are kids (and adults) who are addicted to their Facebook, Droids or Iphones or whatever else might be cool by the time I finish this sentence, I also disagree with a lot that the writer said.
Mainly, kids ain't stupid.
First of all, don't blame them. We've armed them with these devices, and we all use them as much if not more than they do. While driving to work the other day I saw a Dad pushing his baby in a stroller, texting. Later, as I stood outside of my sons' school to pick him up, I noticed the five other parents/guardians/whoevers around me all staring at their phones, either texting, waiting for a text, or waiting for something amazing to happen. And yes, I did have my own phone in hand, which I immediately put away, felt a bit silly. Maybe a better subject for the article would've been PEOPLE are Getting Stupider.
So it's not all the kids. It's like that old anti-drug commercial where the kid is being grilled by his dad after dad finds his pot stash, and the kid shoots back "I learned it from watching you!"
The writer also worries that her child doesn't know the days of the week. My immediate reaction is that her kid is indeed, dumb. I couldn't tell if she was being sarcastic of not, but hell, there's songs about the damn days of the week that pretty much tell you the damn days of the week, it goes like this - Sunday, Monday, Tuesday Wednesday, Thursday Friday, Saturday...." so if her towhead doesn't know them yet, blame the damn school or the teachers. Or maybe the kid should take his head out of his own ass.
The main point that I do agree with the article is cyber bullying. It is easier to cut somebody down, especially if they're not face-to-face. But bullies will always be around, no matter if they're hiding under the bleachers or behind the keyboard. How do we stop it? I don't know that we can and that's scary as hell for the kids today. And as much anti-bullying speeches the teachers give, humans are humans, and there will always be a pile of assholes ready to bully the weak. That goes for adults, too, though, not just teens. For all us nice folks out in the world, there are way too many assbags.
The writer goes on to bring up a mom that was on Facebook, playing Farmville, and her child woke up crying, so the mom shook the kid to death. Blame Faceville all you want, that kid was a goner with or without it. This mom was akin to a ticking time bomb. Mom coulda been scrapbooking or doing laundry or driving or anything else and went off on the poor kid. Condoms or some other birth control should be mandatory until some parents pass some type of test or physical (of the mind - maybe a mental physical!). "Oh, you're actually crazy? Sorry dude, you still gotta bag it." Point is, don't blame some website - instead blame the person who should've put the kid up for adoption.
Today though, some of the technology is simply necessary. Personally, I like the fact that I can call my kid or he can get in touch with me if he needs to or there's some shit going down. I see some of these kids, scanning through their phones or IPads (like Tom Cruise in Minority Report), dumbfounded at the speed and dexterity they can do this. And these kids are stupid? Hell, they're light years ahead.
I think it comes down to adults pointing the finger and saying that kids are dumber than they were. It happened to them, and it happened to their parents, and so on. And the kids that are texting right now at a million characters a second will go on to say the next generation is dumb and don't know the days of the week. But Facebook and Blackberrys are an easy target.
Back in the 80s, we had our own distractions. Not as many, but we still got distracted plenty. Atari, then Nintendo, etc, we're the same. Sure there's more stuff nowadays, but it's not all that different. And the kids that are going to be idiots in 2011 would have been idiots in 1981 or 1951. Can't get around being stupid, the technology (or lack of) that you're wielding doesn't change that.
Mainly, kids ain't stupid.
First of all, don't blame them. We've armed them with these devices, and we all use them as much if not more than they do. While driving to work the other day I saw a Dad pushing his baby in a stroller, texting. Later, as I stood outside of my sons' school to pick him up, I noticed the five other parents/guardians/whoevers around me all staring at their phones, either texting, waiting for a text, or waiting for something amazing to happen. And yes, I did have my own phone in hand, which I immediately put away, felt a bit silly. Maybe a better subject for the article would've been PEOPLE are Getting Stupider.
So it's not all the kids. It's like that old anti-drug commercial where the kid is being grilled by his dad after dad finds his pot stash, and the kid shoots back "I learned it from watching you!"
The writer also worries that her child doesn't know the days of the week. My immediate reaction is that her kid is indeed, dumb. I couldn't tell if she was being sarcastic of not, but hell, there's songs about the damn days of the week that pretty much tell you the damn days of the week, it goes like this - Sunday, Monday, Tuesday Wednesday, Thursday Friday, Saturday...." so if her towhead doesn't know them yet, blame the damn school or the teachers. Or maybe the kid should take his head out of his own ass.
The main point that I do agree with the article is cyber bullying. It is easier to cut somebody down, especially if they're not face-to-face. But bullies will always be around, no matter if they're hiding under the bleachers or behind the keyboard. How do we stop it? I don't know that we can and that's scary as hell for the kids today. And as much anti-bullying speeches the teachers give, humans are humans, and there will always be a pile of assholes ready to bully the weak. That goes for adults, too, though, not just teens. For all us nice folks out in the world, there are way too many assbags.
The writer goes on to bring up a mom that was on Facebook, playing Farmville, and her child woke up crying, so the mom shook the kid to death. Blame Faceville all you want, that kid was a goner with or without it. This mom was akin to a ticking time bomb. Mom coulda been scrapbooking or doing laundry or driving or anything else and went off on the poor kid. Condoms or some other birth control should be mandatory until some parents pass some type of test or physical (of the mind - maybe a mental physical!). "Oh, you're actually crazy? Sorry dude, you still gotta bag it." Point is, don't blame some website - instead blame the person who should've put the kid up for adoption.
Today though, some of the technology is simply necessary. Personally, I like the fact that I can call my kid or he can get in touch with me if he needs to or there's some shit going down. I see some of these kids, scanning through their phones or IPads (like Tom Cruise in Minority Report), dumbfounded at the speed and dexterity they can do this. And these kids are stupid? Hell, they're light years ahead.
I think it comes down to adults pointing the finger and saying that kids are dumber than they were. It happened to them, and it happened to their parents, and so on. And the kids that are texting right now at a million characters a second will go on to say the next generation is dumb and don't know the days of the week. But Facebook and Blackberrys are an easy target.
Back in the 80s, we had our own distractions. Not as many, but we still got distracted plenty. Atari, then Nintendo, etc, we're the same. Sure there's more stuff nowadays, but it's not all that different. And the kids that are going to be idiots in 2011 would have been idiots in 1981 or 1951. Can't get around being stupid, the technology (or lack of) that you're wielding doesn't change that.
Friday, April 23, 2010
Notes From A (Non) High Concept Guy
I'm not High Concept, and that's okay.
A few years ago, along with an agent I had at the time, I was supposed to write a high concept comedy. The agent was a pretty slick dude, more slick than I probably deserved, he even had an umlaut in his name, which I've always wanted, but he knew his shit and was ready to lob me into the Hollywood scene like a grenade. I had plenty of ideas/barely started screenplays to pick from, and he had his umlaut. We settled on The Stand-In, a high concept comedy.
It had a great hook, a damn good concept, most of which actually came from my brother-in-law from many years ago. Although the finished screenplay had some genuinely funny moments and a couple of great sequences, I couldn't make it work, and there were two reasons for that, methinks.
1. At the time, personally I wasn't doing well, lotta shit going on, going through and especially going down, so writing a romantic comedy probably wasn't the best plan, you know, at all, especially a high concept one.
2. I'm not a 3 joke per page kinda guy.
My then-agent realized this, at least reason #2 - I hadn't really informed him about #1 - so he dropped like I was hot. I was peeved at the time, but I moved on pretty quickly from him (shuffled back to my other agent, still with him today). And I was free of the high concept chain around my neck, so in the end, I felt a lot better.
Because at the end of the day, you have to love what you're writing. If not, you're wasting your time, as well as the time of some reader at a production company/studio who may eventually get his/her hands on your phoned-in script and toss it after 10 uninspired pages, if they even get to page 10.
So, I'm not a straight-up comedy guy. I think I've written some funny scripts, but it's tough to stick to the typical comedy format, for me at least. I usually end up with some type of comedy/drama hybrid that a Wes Anderson more than excels at. And maybe that's why I've only had Options in my screenwriting career but have never sold a screenplay, because I'm just not the high concept type.
I don't think that's a bad thing though, I just need to get one of these gems into the right hands, which is always our goal as screenwriters (obviously) anyway. But I hate even calling them comedy/dramas, to me they're just about real shit going on. Life ain't always The Hangover or Forgetting Sarah Marshall, hell, it hardly ever is. And I have yet to come across a hot tub time machine, but if I did, I'ma cannonball right up in that.
To me, life is Cricket Hill, a pretty edgy script I wrote in 2003 about a family at Christmas, dealing with a multitude of issues. Then there's Union, written in 2008, about a father finding out some pretty surprising things about his kids. Surviving Edwards Avenue (2004) is a story about divorce and how one family deals with it.
Those are some of my favorite scripts, a trilogy of family dysfunction at its best, and some of my most accomplished work. And throughout each of them is a bit of comedy, a bit of drama, and a bit of shit hitting the fan. Because, to me, that's real - heart-breaking, inspiring, life-changing. At one moment life is amazing and you're untouchable, and at the next moment the other shoe drops, and you knew it was gonna drop, but you just wished it had waited a little while more before it hit the floor. That's what I write.
And when I'm inspired, and on my game, comedy/drama hybrid label be damned, I think they're the best damn stories I can tell.
It's funny, too, the different type of scripts I write now as opposed to 5, 10 years ago. At first, I had more than a few screenplays about typical college-age dudes or guys in their late 20s searching for themselves, blah, blah, blah. Now, I cringe at those stories, but at the time, I was just writing what I knew. And now I know more (I hope anyway). Now I write about fathers and mothers and love and marriage and disappointment and things coming to an end, or things just beginning. Kisses that become routine, or kisses that amaze. Children and love and despair. Loose teeth and mortgages. Finding passion. White picket fences. Falling out of love. Soccer games. Careers. Making sure your family is okay, and if they're not, making damn sure they will be.
That's what I think about now, and I hope it translates into a decent script or two. I actually had just started a new script this very week. It's about a man at a crossroads. As always, I've had dozens upon dozens of ideas already started, but I can't go back to them now, this one felt right, it feels like it's ready, and when it's ready, it can almost write itself. It's called Square One.
A few years ago, along with an agent I had at the time, I was supposed to write a high concept comedy. The agent was a pretty slick dude, more slick than I probably deserved, he even had an umlaut in his name, which I've always wanted, but he knew his shit and was ready to lob me into the Hollywood scene like a grenade. I had plenty of ideas/barely started screenplays to pick from, and he had his umlaut. We settled on The Stand-In, a high concept comedy.
It had a great hook, a damn good concept, most of which actually came from my brother-in-law from many years ago. Although the finished screenplay had some genuinely funny moments and a couple of great sequences, I couldn't make it work, and there were two reasons for that, methinks.
1. At the time, personally I wasn't doing well, lotta shit going on, going through and especially going down, so writing a romantic comedy probably wasn't the best plan, you know, at all, especially a high concept one.
2. I'm not a 3 joke per page kinda guy.
My then-agent realized this, at least reason #2 - I hadn't really informed him about #1 - so he dropped like I was hot. I was peeved at the time, but I moved on pretty quickly from him (shuffled back to my other agent, still with him today). And I was free of the high concept chain around my neck, so in the end, I felt a lot better.
Because at the end of the day, you have to love what you're writing. If not, you're wasting your time, as well as the time of some reader at a production company/studio who may eventually get his/her hands on your phoned-in script and toss it after 10 uninspired pages, if they even get to page 10.
So, I'm not a straight-up comedy guy. I think I've written some funny scripts, but it's tough to stick to the typical comedy format, for me at least. I usually end up with some type of comedy/drama hybrid that a Wes Anderson more than excels at. And maybe that's why I've only had Options in my screenwriting career but have never sold a screenplay, because I'm just not the high concept type.
I don't think that's a bad thing though, I just need to get one of these gems into the right hands, which is always our goal as screenwriters (obviously) anyway. But I hate even calling them comedy/dramas, to me they're just about real shit going on. Life ain't always The Hangover or Forgetting Sarah Marshall, hell, it hardly ever is. And I have yet to come across a hot tub time machine, but if I did, I'ma cannonball right up in that.
To me, life is Cricket Hill, a pretty edgy script I wrote in 2003 about a family at Christmas, dealing with a multitude of issues. Then there's Union, written in 2008, about a father finding out some pretty surprising things about his kids. Surviving Edwards Avenue (2004) is a story about divorce and how one family deals with it.
Those are some of my favorite scripts, a trilogy of family dysfunction at its best, and some of my most accomplished work. And throughout each of them is a bit of comedy, a bit of drama, and a bit of shit hitting the fan. Because, to me, that's real - heart-breaking, inspiring, life-changing. At one moment life is amazing and you're untouchable, and at the next moment the other shoe drops, and you knew it was gonna drop, but you just wished it had waited a little while more before it hit the floor. That's what I write.
And when I'm inspired, and on my game, comedy/drama hybrid label be damned, I think they're the best damn stories I can tell.
It's funny, too, the different type of scripts I write now as opposed to 5, 10 years ago. At first, I had more than a few screenplays about typical college-age dudes or guys in their late 20s searching for themselves, blah, blah, blah. Now, I cringe at those stories, but at the time, I was just writing what I knew. And now I know more (I hope anyway). Now I write about fathers and mothers and love and marriage and disappointment and things coming to an end, or things just beginning. Kisses that become routine, or kisses that amaze. Children and love and despair. Loose teeth and mortgages. Finding passion. White picket fences. Falling out of love. Soccer games. Careers. Making sure your family is okay, and if they're not, making damn sure they will be.
That's what I think about now, and I hope it translates into a decent script or two. I actually had just started a new script this very week. It's about a man at a crossroads. As always, I've had dozens upon dozens of ideas already started, but I can't go back to them now, this one felt right, it feels like it's ready, and when it's ready, it can almost write itself. It's called Square One.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Surviving Edwards Avenue - Fight Scene - Screenplay Vs. Novel
First of all, excuse the wonky formatting. I'm sure there's a better way to post a screenplay & novel pages on here, but if there is, I certainly don't know it. So what I've posted here is the same scene that unfolds in both the screenplay version (written originally in '04) and the novel version (2010). Just a neat exercise. Enjoy!
SCREENPLAY Version 2004 (Pg. 87-89)
EXT. MOBILE HOME
Roger bangs on Brandi’s door. JIMMY, a local tough guy in his 30s, answers. Roger gets in a fighting stance.
ROGER
C’mon, let’s dance.
Jimmy hops down and nails him in the stomach. Roger falls to his knees.
ROGER(grunting)
I’m gonna kick your ass.
JIMMY
Whenever you’re ready, bitch!
Brandi comes to the door.
BRANDI
Oh, no. Roger go home.
Roger stands.
ROGER
I love you, Brandi.
Jimmy charges him and knocks him against the mobile home. It rocks slightly.
BRANDI
Guys! Watch it! You’ll knock the house over!
They fall to the ground and wrestle. Roger throws dirt in Jimmy’s face.
ROGER
Ha, fucknose!!!
Jimmy punches him in the mouth and Roger falls off.
BRANDI
I don’t love you, Roger!
Roger barely stands.
ROGER
Sure you do!
Jimmy puts him in a choke-hold. Roger gasps for air.
BRANDI
I don’t. What we had was kinda fun. But what me and Jimmy have is funner.
JIMMY(still choking Roger)
“More fun” baby.
BRANDI
Don’t correct me, Jimmy. You know I hate that!
Roger gets loose and swings at Jimmy. Misses. Jimmy easily pops Roger again on the cheek.
JIMMY
This is fun.
ROGER(holds cheek)
I’ll take care of you, Brandi. Just tell me what you want me to do!
Jimmy gets another punch ready.
BRANDI
Leave me alone and never come around here again. I will never love you, okay?
Jimmy lowers his fist.
JIMMY
Damn. That was more painful than I coulda done.
ROGER
What about the baby?
BRANDI
First of all, it ain’t yours. Second, I ain’t pregnant.
ROGER
You’re not?
BRANDI
No. Daddy said it was probably just gas.
JIMMY
She ain’t lyin.’ I never seen a chick with so much gas. Even when she sleepin!’(imitates fart)Brrrrmppptt!! There goes another one!
BRANDI
I took a test. It was negative.
ROGER
Gas.
JIMMY
Stanky ones, too. Damn! Somethin’ crawled up there and died, boy!
BRANDI
Now leave.
Roger takes in his surroundings and nods.
ROGER
Okay.(to Jimmy)Truce?
JIMMY
Yeah, man. Truce.
Roger nods. He walks by Jimmy and takes another swing. He misses. Jimmy nails him in the stomach and drills him with an upper-cut.
NOVEL Version (2010)
As Roger runs through the rows of mobile homes, he has no idea what he’ll say or do but figures making a plan at this point is useless and decides to make it up as he goes. One thought crosses his mind - what if she’s not home? But that thought soon passes when Roger remembers she hasn’t worked a day in her life and wasn’t likely to start now.
Roger bangs on Brandi’s door, out-of-breath. He tries to compose himself as the footsteps approach and smiles as the door opens. But Jimmy is standing there instead of Brandi, and of all the scenarios that Roger went through on his breath-reducing run through the trailer park, this wasn’t one of them.
Jimmy Durban is thirty-two years old and has been working at Al’s Stop & Gas on the edge of town for six years now. He’s got a neck full of tattoos, a shaved head and two lip piercings. He’s a pretty good looking guy under the paraphernalia and swagger, and he sings lead vocals in a local band called The Devastation that actually had a song on the radio last year. So he already had a head start over Roger, who didn’t have any piercings, tattoos, swagger or a song on the radio.
Roger isn’t sure what to do, so he gets in a fighting stance. He wants to say something bad ass, something tough, but when he starts to say “C’mon, let’s dance“ he doesn’t get all of it out because Jimmy has already punched him hard in the stomach and he falls to his knees. Not only does the punch hurt just about all of his internal organs, but it gives him the instant sensation that he has to take shit. Luckily no bowel movement occurs and the feeling passes, and he stands on his now-shaky feet. “I’m gonna kick your ass, Jimmy,” he is able to get out, and is surprised that he is able to get it out without vomiting.
Jimmy just laughs and readies another punch. “Whenever you’re ready, bitch!”
Brandi comes to the door, popping some gum, to see what the hell is going on. “Oh, no. Roger, go home.” Pop pop. She’s not really all that pissed, having a couple of dudes fighting over her gives her quite a thrill.
Roger smiles and stumbles toward her. “I love you, Brandi.”
Jimmy charges him and knocks him against the mobile home. It rocks slightly.
Brandi screams. Pop pop. “Guys! Watch it! You’ll knock the house over!”
They fall to the ground and wrestle. Roger grabs a handful of grass and dirt and throws dirt in Jimmy’s face. “Ha, fuckface!”
Jimmy punches him in the nose and Roger falls, seeing nothing but stars for a moment.
“I don’t love you, Roger!” Brandi belts out, and it slices through Roger almost as brutally as Jimmy‘s punch.
Roger rolls on the ground and finds his footing, and barely stands. “Sure you do!” he mumbles as blood from his broken nose fills his mouth.
Jimmy grabs him and puts him in a choke-hold. Roger can do nothing but stand there and have his heart broken yet again.
She sighs. “I don’t. What we had was kinda fun. But what me and Jimmy have is funner.”
Jimmy doesn‘t stop choking Roger but offers “’More fun, baby.”
“Don’t correct me, Jimmy! You know I hate that!”
Roger gets loose and swings at Jimmy. Misses by a lot. The pain in Roger’s stomach has spread to his chest, and the pain from his nose has enveloped his face. Jimmy easily pops Roger again on the cheek.
“This is fun!” hoots Jimmy.
Roger stops and lets himself bleed. “I’ll take care of you, Brandi. Just tell me what you want me to do.”
Jimmy gets another punch ready.
“Leave me alone and never come around here again. I will never love you, okay?”
Jimmy lowers his fist. “Damn. That was more painful than I coulda done.”
Roger takes a step toward her. “What about the baby?”
“First of all, it ain’t yours. Second, I ain’t pregnant.”
“You’re not?”
“No. Daddy said it was probably just gas.” Pop pop.
Jimmy laughs and slaps Roger on the back. “She ain’t lyin!’ I never seen a chick with so much gas. Even when she sleepin!’ Jimmy crudely imitates a fart. “Brrrrmppptt!! There goes another one!”
“I took a blood test. It was negative.” Brandi sits on the top step.
Roger sighs. “Gas.”
“Stanky ones, too“ Jimmy continues. “Damn! Somethin’ crawled up there and died, boy!”
“Now leave, Roger, please” she says.
Roger takes in his surroundings - the maze of trailers, Jimmy, Brandi, his throbbing face, the blood on his shirt and hands - and nods. “Okay.” He turns to Jimmy. “Truce?”
“Yeah, dude. Truce.”
Roger nods but decides to end things on a sucker punch. Why the hell not. Not much else to lose. As he walks by Jimmy he takes another swing but misses yet again. Jimmy nails him in the stomach again and drills him with an upper-cut.
Twenty minutes later, Roger is walking home, a beaten man in every possible sense. His ribs are killing him, and his face feels fat with pain. He’s about a block from his house when he stops walking and carefully sits on the side of the road, although he doesn’t quite make it to the curb. A car slows as it passes but keeps going. When the tears come, he’s not surprised, he’d just taken a lot of punches, but the pain he’s feeling is from within himself and has nothing to do with his bloody nose, bruised ribs or black eyes. He lost Brandi, simple as that, and for some reason he was having a hard time dealing with this one. He’d lost girls before, to broken stars and for other reasons not quite as celestial, but losing Brandi was ripping him apart. He cries hard, shaking, gagging and quivering, until he thinks it’s over, but it isn’t. His body isn’t done with him yet, and when the tears don’t stop he realizes it‘s just the beginning.
SCREENPLAY Version 2004 (Pg. 87-89)
EXT. MOBILE HOME
Roger bangs on Brandi’s door. JIMMY, a local tough guy in his 30s, answers. Roger gets in a fighting stance.
ROGER
C’mon, let’s dance.
Jimmy hops down and nails him in the stomach. Roger falls to his knees.
ROGER(grunting)
I’m gonna kick your ass.
JIMMY
Whenever you’re ready, bitch!
Brandi comes to the door.
BRANDI
Oh, no. Roger go home.
Roger stands.
ROGER
I love you, Brandi.
Jimmy charges him and knocks him against the mobile home. It rocks slightly.
BRANDI
Guys! Watch it! You’ll knock the house over!
They fall to the ground and wrestle. Roger throws dirt in Jimmy’s face.
ROGER
Ha, fucknose!!!
Jimmy punches him in the mouth and Roger falls off.
BRANDI
I don’t love you, Roger!
Roger barely stands.
ROGER
Sure you do!
Jimmy puts him in a choke-hold. Roger gasps for air.
BRANDI
I don’t. What we had was kinda fun. But what me and Jimmy have is funner.
JIMMY(still choking Roger)
“More fun” baby.
BRANDI
Don’t correct me, Jimmy. You know I hate that!
Roger gets loose and swings at Jimmy. Misses. Jimmy easily pops Roger again on the cheek.
JIMMY
This is fun.
ROGER(holds cheek)
I’ll take care of you, Brandi. Just tell me what you want me to do!
Jimmy gets another punch ready.
BRANDI
Leave me alone and never come around here again. I will never love you, okay?
Jimmy lowers his fist.
JIMMY
Damn. That was more painful than I coulda done.
ROGER
What about the baby?
BRANDI
First of all, it ain’t yours. Second, I ain’t pregnant.
ROGER
You’re not?
BRANDI
No. Daddy said it was probably just gas.
JIMMY
She ain’t lyin.’ I never seen a chick with so much gas. Even when she sleepin!’(imitates fart)Brrrrmppptt!! There goes another one!
BRANDI
I took a test. It was negative.
ROGER
Gas.
JIMMY
Stanky ones, too. Damn! Somethin’ crawled up there and died, boy!
BRANDI
Now leave.
Roger takes in his surroundings and nods.
ROGER
Okay.(to Jimmy)Truce?
JIMMY
Yeah, man. Truce.
Roger nods. He walks by Jimmy and takes another swing. He misses. Jimmy nails him in the stomach and drills him with an upper-cut.
NOVEL Version (2010)
As Roger runs through the rows of mobile homes, he has no idea what he’ll say or do but figures making a plan at this point is useless and decides to make it up as he goes. One thought crosses his mind - what if she’s not home? But that thought soon passes when Roger remembers she hasn’t worked a day in her life and wasn’t likely to start now.
Roger bangs on Brandi’s door, out-of-breath. He tries to compose himself as the footsteps approach and smiles as the door opens. But Jimmy is standing there instead of Brandi, and of all the scenarios that Roger went through on his breath-reducing run through the trailer park, this wasn’t one of them.
Jimmy Durban is thirty-two years old and has been working at Al’s Stop & Gas on the edge of town for six years now. He’s got a neck full of tattoos, a shaved head and two lip piercings. He’s a pretty good looking guy under the paraphernalia and swagger, and he sings lead vocals in a local band called The Devastation that actually had a song on the radio last year. So he already had a head start over Roger, who didn’t have any piercings, tattoos, swagger or a song on the radio.
Roger isn’t sure what to do, so he gets in a fighting stance. He wants to say something bad ass, something tough, but when he starts to say “C’mon, let’s dance“ he doesn’t get all of it out because Jimmy has already punched him hard in the stomach and he falls to his knees. Not only does the punch hurt just about all of his internal organs, but it gives him the instant sensation that he has to take shit. Luckily no bowel movement occurs and the feeling passes, and he stands on his now-shaky feet. “I’m gonna kick your ass, Jimmy,” he is able to get out, and is surprised that he is able to get it out without vomiting.
Jimmy just laughs and readies another punch. “Whenever you’re ready, bitch!”
Brandi comes to the door, popping some gum, to see what the hell is going on. “Oh, no. Roger, go home.” Pop pop. She’s not really all that pissed, having a couple of dudes fighting over her gives her quite a thrill.
Roger smiles and stumbles toward her. “I love you, Brandi.”
Jimmy charges him and knocks him against the mobile home. It rocks slightly.
Brandi screams. Pop pop. “Guys! Watch it! You’ll knock the house over!”
They fall to the ground and wrestle. Roger grabs a handful of grass and dirt and throws dirt in Jimmy’s face. “Ha, fuckface!”
Jimmy punches him in the nose and Roger falls, seeing nothing but stars for a moment.
“I don’t love you, Roger!” Brandi belts out, and it slices through Roger almost as brutally as Jimmy‘s punch.
Roger rolls on the ground and finds his footing, and barely stands. “Sure you do!” he mumbles as blood from his broken nose fills his mouth.
Jimmy grabs him and puts him in a choke-hold. Roger can do nothing but stand there and have his heart broken yet again.
She sighs. “I don’t. What we had was kinda fun. But what me and Jimmy have is funner.”
Jimmy doesn‘t stop choking Roger but offers “’More fun, baby.”
“Don’t correct me, Jimmy! You know I hate that!”
Roger gets loose and swings at Jimmy. Misses by a lot. The pain in Roger’s stomach has spread to his chest, and the pain from his nose has enveloped his face. Jimmy easily pops Roger again on the cheek.
“This is fun!” hoots Jimmy.
Roger stops and lets himself bleed. “I’ll take care of you, Brandi. Just tell me what you want me to do.”
Jimmy gets another punch ready.
“Leave me alone and never come around here again. I will never love you, okay?”
Jimmy lowers his fist. “Damn. That was more painful than I coulda done.”
Roger takes a step toward her. “What about the baby?”
“First of all, it ain’t yours. Second, I ain’t pregnant.”
“You’re not?”
“No. Daddy said it was probably just gas.” Pop pop.
Jimmy laughs and slaps Roger on the back. “She ain’t lyin!’ I never seen a chick with so much gas. Even when she sleepin!’ Jimmy crudely imitates a fart. “Brrrrmppptt!! There goes another one!”
“I took a blood test. It was negative.” Brandi sits on the top step.
Roger sighs. “Gas.”
“Stanky ones, too“ Jimmy continues. “Damn! Somethin’ crawled up there and died, boy!”
“Now leave, Roger, please” she says.
Roger takes in his surroundings - the maze of trailers, Jimmy, Brandi, his throbbing face, the blood on his shirt and hands - and nods. “Okay.” He turns to Jimmy. “Truce?”
“Yeah, dude. Truce.”
Roger nods but decides to end things on a sucker punch. Why the hell not. Not much else to lose. As he walks by Jimmy he takes another swing but misses yet again. Jimmy nails him in the stomach again and drills him with an upper-cut.
Twenty minutes later, Roger is walking home, a beaten man in every possible sense. His ribs are killing him, and his face feels fat with pain. He’s about a block from his house when he stops walking and carefully sits on the side of the road, although he doesn’t quite make it to the curb. A car slows as it passes but keeps going. When the tears come, he’s not surprised, he’d just taken a lot of punches, but the pain he’s feeling is from within himself and has nothing to do with his bloody nose, bruised ribs or black eyes. He lost Brandi, simple as that, and for some reason he was having a hard time dealing with this one. He’d lost girls before, to broken stars and for other reasons not quite as celestial, but losing Brandi was ripping him apart. He cries hard, shaking, gagging and quivering, until he thinks it’s over, but it isn’t. His body isn’t done with him yet, and when the tears don’t stop he realizes it‘s just the beginning.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Adaptation
I first wrote Surviving Edwards Avenue in 2004, as a companion to another script which almost won at Austin '03, called Cricket Hill. I liked Surviving Edwards Avenue, sent it out, it was a bit more edgy that Cricket Hill, but I had no luck with it. So away it went - until this January, when I decided to write a book. A novel. I had so many damn scripts written (55) that I said to myself, "Self, just adapt one of your screenplays."
And now, Surviving Edwards Avenue is almost complete, I'm at 40,000+ words now, working on the last chapters. It's funny, writing a book. For years I've been streamlining thoughts and stories, showing the actions instead of saying. And now, obviously, it's the oppposite.
And I love it.
I can really get inside the characters' heads, and tell the reader EXACTLY what they're thinking.
As I was writing the novel version, something was changing with the story. When I first wrote the screenplay 6 years ago, it was much more comedic, but as I write the novel version, it's less so. I find myself scaling back the humor, going in more for the drama of the situation (the plot is 3 kids dealing with their parents divorce). What seemed irreverant before now has taken a turn, but it feels right. And certain things that happened in the screenplay seem ridiculous now so I've had to do a bit of plot modification. Actually, if I ever did want to send out the screenplay again, I'd have to do some major tweaking & re-writing - and I only really discovered this when I started the book.
The plan is to finish it this week, let it digest a bit, then go through it and fix what needs fixin.' Not the usual way I'd suggest handling a re-write - writing a book first - but it's working this time, and I can't wait to finish it.
And now, Surviving Edwards Avenue is almost complete, I'm at 40,000+ words now, working on the last chapters. It's funny, writing a book. For years I've been streamlining thoughts and stories, showing the actions instead of saying. And now, obviously, it's the oppposite.
And I love it.
I can really get inside the characters' heads, and tell the reader EXACTLY what they're thinking.
As I was writing the novel version, something was changing with the story. When I first wrote the screenplay 6 years ago, it was much more comedic, but as I write the novel version, it's less so. I find myself scaling back the humor, going in more for the drama of the situation (the plot is 3 kids dealing with their parents divorce). What seemed irreverant before now has taken a turn, but it feels right. And certain things that happened in the screenplay seem ridiculous now so I've had to do a bit of plot modification. Actually, if I ever did want to send out the screenplay again, I'd have to do some major tweaking & re-writing - and I only really discovered this when I started the book.
The plan is to finish it this week, let it digest a bit, then go through it and fix what needs fixin.' Not the usual way I'd suggest handling a re-write - writing a book first - but it's working this time, and I can't wait to finish it.
Monday, January 04, 2010
Creating Moments
In my most recent script, Zombie, NJ, I tried to make a certain sequence really stand out. I tried to make it a moment to remember. I could have written it pretty easily, a quick scene that gets the characters from Point A to Point B.
But I wanted it to be memorable. Like one of those sequences that you'll remember as your favorite part, sequence or whatever. It's a scene in a crawlspace, the main characters (three 15 year olds) are hiding under the house as zombies rip apart the house above, searching for fresh meat. I tried as best I could to draw out the tension (the horror above them, their current dark & wet surroundings). On the page, I made it last about 2 pages, when it could have been easily half that. It's my favorite scene in the screenplay.
In the last year, we had some fine moments in theaters:
(500) Days Of Summer - You Make My Dreams sequence.
Up In The Air - The scene where they're firing the older employee via teleconference, and he's actually in the adjoining office.
The Hurt Locker - Many moments here, but one that sticks with me is the sniper scene - Bigelow really draws out the drama here. I think the scene was like 15 minutes long, ever wrending second was amazing.
Up - The opening montage.
There are certainly others, but you get my point. When I started writing I didn't pay as much attention to these things, was simply worried about dialogue, structure, story (things we obviously need to worry about!) but after the script reader/agent/assistant/Spielberg puts the script down, you want to give them another reason to pick up the phone.
But I wanted it to be memorable. Like one of those sequences that you'll remember as your favorite part, sequence or whatever. It's a scene in a crawlspace, the main characters (three 15 year olds) are hiding under the house as zombies rip apart the house above, searching for fresh meat. I tried as best I could to draw out the tension (the horror above them, their current dark & wet surroundings). On the page, I made it last about 2 pages, when it could have been easily half that. It's my favorite scene in the screenplay.
In the last year, we had some fine moments in theaters:
(500) Days Of Summer - You Make My Dreams sequence.
Up In The Air - The scene where they're firing the older employee via teleconference, and he's actually in the adjoining office.
The Hurt Locker - Many moments here, but one that sticks with me is the sniper scene - Bigelow really draws out the drama here. I think the scene was like 15 minutes long, ever wrending second was amazing.
Up - The opening montage.
There are certainly others, but you get my point. When I started writing I didn't pay as much attention to these things, was simply worried about dialogue, structure, story (things we obviously need to worry about!) but after the script reader/agent/assistant/Spielberg puts the script down, you want to give them another reason to pick up the phone.
Sunday, January 03, 2010
Screenwriting 2009 - Fail
Why? Because I only finished 1 script. Zombie, NJ. Don't get me wrong, I like the script, but there are SO many other ideas/scripts already started that I want to get into my Final Draft folder. I did finish a decent re-write of another (Goombah, formerly called Family Values).
And the contests/festivals/lost causes that I entered went nowhere - do they ever?
I had about 5-6 script requests that I sent out. Nada. I'm still waiting to hear about one of those, but it's been 3 months, so I'd call that a wash.
I'm looking at new places to list scripts. I've had stuff on Inktip & Movies-bytes for years. Where else is there to list? I've come across a few sites here and there but I dunno.
I did try to start a new script for 2010. Yes, I still have the 20+ other ideas in my head & hard drive, but I thought a new year should bring a new script. Maybe it'll be the one.
And the contests/festivals/lost causes that I entered went nowhere - do they ever?
I had about 5-6 script requests that I sent out. Nada. I'm still waiting to hear about one of those, but it's been 3 months, so I'd call that a wash.
I'm looking at new places to list scripts. I've had stuff on Inktip & Movies-bytes for years. Where else is there to list? I've come across a few sites here and there but I dunno.
I did try to start a new script for 2010. Yes, I still have the 20+ other ideas in my head & hard drive, but I thought a new year should bring a new script. Maybe it'll be the one.
'09
Best TV of 2009 - Breaking Bad; Modern Family; Glee; 30 Rock; The Office; Mad Men; Lost, Dexter; The United States Of Tara; The Middle; Big Love; True Blood; Men Of A Certain Age; Fringe, It's Always Sunny In Philly
Best Songs of 2009 - Youth Group - Friedrichstrasse; East Hundred - Plus Minus; Passion Pit - Moth's Wings; Temper Trap - Sweet Disposition; Jason Lytle - Yours Truly, the Commander; Kings Of Leon - Notion; The Dears - Money Babies; Julian Plenti - Unwind; One Day International - Not Over You; Matt & Kim - Daylight (for me, Daylight is my song of the year).
Best Albums - Passion Pit - Manners; Matt & Kim - Grand; Youth Group - The Night Is Ours, East Hundred - Passenger
Best Movies of '09 - The Hurt Locker - Up In The Air - (500) Days Of Summer - Fantastic Mr. Fox - Up - I Love You, Man - Where The Wild Things Are - District 9 - Star Trek - The Hangover - Away We Go.
You?
Best Songs of 2009 - Youth Group - Friedrichstrasse; East Hundred - Plus Minus; Passion Pit - Moth's Wings; Temper Trap - Sweet Disposition; Jason Lytle - Yours Truly, the Commander; Kings Of Leon - Notion; The Dears - Money Babies; Julian Plenti - Unwind; One Day International - Not Over You; Matt & Kim - Daylight (for me, Daylight is my song of the year).
Best Albums - Passion Pit - Manners; Matt & Kim - Grand; Youth Group - The Night Is Ours, East Hundred - Passenger
Best Movies of '09 - The Hurt Locker - Up In The Air - (500) Days Of Summer - Fantastic Mr. Fox - Up - I Love You, Man - Where The Wild Things Are - District 9 - Star Trek - The Hangover - Away We Go.
You?
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
WTF - Why the Face?
Ok, back.
So, what's up? Well......
I finished a script. Not a huge deal but it's my first completed script in a year after dozens of stops & starts. Anyways, it's called Zombie, NJ, and it's about, well, that. I like it, it's fun, goofy, topical, and has some pretty cool sequences. My first real popcorn script you could say.
I started to tweet. Sorry for the lack of tweets, I'll try to be a better tweeter. http://twitter.com/PatRodio
Here is another Twitter page I follow - http://twitter.com/KipKoopa
I'm on Facebook still, and have uploaded gallons of pix from the past movie productions I shot a few years ago. It's fun to look back, but I do miss shooting stuff.
Movies I've seen of late - Where The Wild Things Are - A Beauty. Wow.
Planet 51 - Cute, has some stuff for the adults, but a decent kid flick.
Want to see: Men Who Stare At Goats, Up In The Air, Lovely Bones, Greenburg (Noah Baumbach's next film) and Fantastic Mr. Fox.
Good TV - Modern Family. Glee. Bored To Death. Sunny/Philly.
Listening to: The Dears. Julian Plenti. Jason Lytle. MGMT. Passion Pit.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
2009 Summer Movies
Haven't seen Food Inc, 500 Days Of Summer, The Cove or District 9 yet, so they could make a best-of list, but for now......
The Best........
The Hurt Locker - Stunning, tense. With top of the line performances from Jeremy Renner and Anthony Mackie; awesome, taut direction from Kathryn Bigelow; and a bad-ass script.
Up - Beautiful. Bittersweet. Devastating. Inspiring.
The Hangover - Simply put, funny as Hells.
Star Trek - Fun, exciting - what the new Star Wars trilogy should have been. Wish George Lucas had JJ Abrahms direct the new trilogy.
The Not-So-Best......
Ice Age 3 - Pretty harmless, but pointless stuff.
GI Joe - Actually had some fun sequences, and there's a great movie to be had here, somewhere. But Tatum as Duke? Duke's not a mumbler.
Funny People - I liked the look inside of comedians lives (though we've already seen it before), and it had some funny moments, but overall, it was hard to get into. Sandler was almost impossible to like/root for, and he did a great job actually with the role, but still, he was just too much of a prick.
Night At The Museum 2 - Eh, it was okay. Again, kinda pointless story-wise, but had some good moments here and there.
The Best........
The Hurt Locker - Stunning, tense. With top of the line performances from Jeremy Renner and Anthony Mackie; awesome, taut direction from Kathryn Bigelow; and a bad-ass script.
Up - Beautiful. Bittersweet. Devastating. Inspiring.
The Hangover - Simply put, funny as Hells.
Star Trek - Fun, exciting - what the new Star Wars trilogy should have been. Wish George Lucas had JJ Abrahms direct the new trilogy.
The Not-So-Best......
Ice Age 3 - Pretty harmless, but pointless stuff.
GI Joe - Actually had some fun sequences, and there's a great movie to be had here, somewhere. But Tatum as Duke? Duke's not a mumbler.
Funny People - I liked the look inside of comedians lives (though we've already seen it before), and it had some funny moments, but overall, it was hard to get into. Sandler was almost impossible to like/root for, and he did a great job actually with the role, but still, he was just too much of a prick.
Night At The Museum 2 - Eh, it was okay. Again, kinda pointless story-wise, but had some good moments here and there.
Friday, August 07, 2009
Could You Describe The Ruckus?
When I heard of John Hughes' passing yesterday, it really hit me. And when you sit back and think about how his writing has shaped us, our movies, everything, it sorta blows your mind.
What I always liked about his work was he was writing for us. And he knew us. He felt like he was one of us.
Just think about the movies he's written (and some he directed)...Mr. Mom, National Lampoon's Vacation, Sixteen Candles, The Breakfast Club, Planes Trains & Automobiles, She's Having A Baby, Weird Science, Pretty In Pink, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Some Kind Of Wonderful, The Great Outdoors, Uncle Buck, Home Alone, National Lampoon's European Vacation, Christmas Vacation, Curly Sue, Career Opportunities, etc.
"That's why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they'd call them something else." Sixteen Candles
For obvious reasons (and the name of this blog/current post) one of my faves is The Breakfast Club. It's an almost perfect film for me. The characters are priceless, and the writing is spot on. Terrific pacing, too.
It starts out as fun, a bit of a romp, but then quickly becomes something else - something meaningful.
Something about life.
It's how teens think, act. What they do. The shit they have to deal with. Popularity. Violence. Geekdom. Pressure. Love. Hate.
And you can see how he loved these characters. Because he gave them hearts. He gave all of his characters heart. I mean, who hasn't thought about life, what they're going to be, how are they going to get out of the funk they're in, etc.
Even Ferris Bueller, with all it's fun and attitude (and dance scenes), we think about what's ahead, and what we're leaving behind.
And then he grew up, and gave us Planes Traines & Automobiles, She's Having A Baby, some of his most accomplished works, in my opinion.
In Planes, he pulls a similar switcharoo. We start with Steve Martin dealing with the New Buddy From Hell, and how that evolves into a true friendship. And heartbreak, too, when we discover John Candy's character is basically homeless, mourning the loss of his beloved wife. That's heavy stuff for a comedy.
She's Having A Baby. The pressure, the panic, of fatherhood. Did I do the right thing? What am I doing? I'm going to be a father! But when it comes down to it, when his wife and baby are in distress, life slaps Kevin Bacon in the face - nothing else matters but them - and he wakes up, ready for fatherhood, to be a better husband. Funny? Maybe not, but real? Yup.
Even though his career seemed to be winding down (he wrote numerous screenplays under an alias - the Beethoven movies, a few Home Alone direct-to-Tv sequels), his resume is painfully impressive, and who knows what he still may have had up his sleeve.
Dear Mr. Vernon: We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it is we did wrong, but we think you're crazy for making us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us: in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain, and an athlete, and a basket case, a princess, and a criminal. Does that answer your question?
Sincerely yours,
The Breakfast Club.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
Throwing $50 out the window
I wanted to write this on June 8th, but, well, I didn't. But I wanted to share.
6/8 was the deadline for Austin. And I just HAD to send something. I had a few choices I was thinking about sending a month prior, but life sped up to the weekend prior to the late deadline and there I was, with nothing sent yet. So I decided to send The Stand-In.
So I went to print it on Friday night, thinking I can mail it Saturday the 6th. But I discovered I was out of ink.
Fuck.
So, after work on Saturday I buy ink. Head home, print the mofo out. But I don't have 3 hole punch paper (I swore I did), and can't find my 3-hole puncher. Post office is closed anway so I gotta wait 'til Monday.
Monday the 8th.
6:30am. Rise. Make breakfast for my kids.
7:00am. Get spatula, scrape kids out of bed.
8:15am. Drop the kids off at school, head to work, take script and entry materials with me.
9:00am. Start working. No time to mail script yet.
12:00. First inspection (I'm a home inspector) runs long. I know my office has a 3 hole punch so I run over there, 3-hole punch The Stand In, then realize I still need card stock covers. But I'm running late and head straight to 2nd inspection.
NOTE: It's at this point of my day that I wish Austin joined the 00's and accepted e-mail submissions.
4:00pm. Inspection ends. Hit Staples to grab card stock. Attach card stock, head to Post Office.
4:53pm. While in line at Post Office I make the mistake at glancing at the script (don't do this). I see two things that I would immediately want to change. Not typos, but poor wording.
On the 1st page.
No time for corrections, I mailed it off.
Hectic day aside, my thoughts spin around me. Did I pick the right script? I thought it was a good comedy, but good enough to place? I just don't know. I got my notice from BlueCat regarding the quarterfinals (didn't make it). I wasn't even in the top 987,645,464 quarter-finalists. And what did I send? The Stand-In.
So, Austin looks bleak. Enjoy the $50 bucks, Austin. Buy yourself something pretty.
6/8 was the deadline for Austin. And I just HAD to send something. I had a few choices I was thinking about sending a month prior, but life sped up to the weekend prior to the late deadline and there I was, with nothing sent yet. So I decided to send The Stand-In.
So I went to print it on Friday night, thinking I can mail it Saturday the 6th. But I discovered I was out of ink.
Fuck.
So, after work on Saturday I buy ink. Head home, print the mofo out. But I don't have 3 hole punch paper (I swore I did), and can't find my 3-hole puncher. Post office is closed anway so I gotta wait 'til Monday.
Monday the 8th.
6:30am. Rise. Make breakfast for my kids.
7:00am. Get spatula, scrape kids out of bed.
8:15am. Drop the kids off at school, head to work, take script and entry materials with me.
9:00am. Start working. No time to mail script yet.
12:00. First inspection (I'm a home inspector) runs long. I know my office has a 3 hole punch so I run over there, 3-hole punch The Stand In, then realize I still need card stock covers. But I'm running late and head straight to 2nd inspection.
NOTE: It's at this point of my day that I wish Austin joined the 00's and accepted e-mail submissions.
4:00pm. Inspection ends. Hit Staples to grab card stock. Attach card stock, head to Post Office.
4:53pm. While in line at Post Office I make the mistake at glancing at the script (don't do this). I see two things that I would immediately want to change. Not typos, but poor wording.
On the 1st page.
No time for corrections, I mailed it off.
Hectic day aside, my thoughts spin around me. Did I pick the right script? I thought it was a good comedy, but good enough to place? I just don't know. I got my notice from BlueCat regarding the quarterfinals (didn't make it). I wasn't even in the top 987,645,464 quarter-finalists. And what did I send? The Stand-In.
So, Austin looks bleak. Enjoy the $50 bucks, Austin. Buy yourself something pretty.
Saturday, June 06, 2009
Where Are We?
Hello? Fellow bloggers? Where the hell did we go? Are we over the blogging thing? I dunno. I mean, I have time to post, I just don't do it. And it seems like a lot of other bloggers/writers have stopped as well. Not all, of course, but there's been a noticeable drop off.
Are we busy writing? Working the day job? Raising a family? Farting around? Farting?
Writing's been hard to get going. I still have several scripts started and am working on them as I much as I can, I've listed their titles here before. I'll mail out The Stand-In to Austin on Monday, and am waiting on the Bluecat Results (quarterfinals announced soon).
Peace out.
Are we busy writing? Working the day job? Raising a family? Farting around? Farting?
Writing's been hard to get going. I still have several scripts started and am working on them as I much as I can, I've listed their titles here before. I'll mail out The Stand-In to Austin on Monday, and am waiting on the Bluecat Results (quarterfinals announced soon).
Peace out.
Saturday, April 04, 2009
BlueCat Feedback - The Stand-In
Okay, gang, here's the feedback from Bluecat, for my comedy, The Stand-In. My logline is:
Pete, an anti-social loser, hires a male model, Simon, to attend his high school reunion cruise as Pete to "wow" his former classmates. But when Simon falls for Kara, Pete's high school crush, Pete takes matters into his own hands and battles the model for her heart.
The feedback.....
What did you like about this script?
Pete's initial humiliation-by-wedgie is an amusing scene. Pete clearlyseems destined for a life of humiliation and sexual failure; youeffectively set him up as a protagonist who needs to transform himself and his life.
When we jump forward chronologically, you swiftly establish that Pete is still a put-upon individual: his good nature is exploited by his colleagues, who pile their work upon him. His dress sense may have improved (slightly), but he seems no closer to romantic success. Will the impending school reunion enable Pete to correct wrong turns that he's previously taken, or will it just be a reminder of his sexual and social failure as a teenager, a pattern that heappears to be stuck in?
You quickly establish Simon as a rather vacuous, self-absorbed hunk.The scenes in which he feigns concern for the starving Africans before switching to diva-esque behavior between takes are amusing (if a little obvious). The impending reunion sets the main plot in motion:Pete hires Simon to impersonate him, creating the impression that he'ssucceeded in life. It's a premise that has comic potential. We already anticipate that things won't go quite according to plan; is Pete's aspiration (to impress everyone with "his" (Simon's) good looks and material success) a false goal? Perhaps accepting himself and being unashamed will prove to be his true goal.
You derive some farcical energy from the scenes on the boat. You quickly show Pete's plan coming unravelled: Simon wants Kara for himself, while Pete discovers that Kara actually had a crush on theold, socially-maladjusted him; he'd have been better off appearingunder his own guise rather than that of the fictitious "Chuck". Of course, Kara hates liars, so he feels compelled not to come forward immediately (a narrative contrivance that is just about convincing).
You tighten the screws on Pete as Simon appears to be successfully winning Kara's heart. How will he undo the confusion he's caused? Can he hope to win Kara away from Simon? Will the (unavoidable) revelation of his true identity anger Kara when it finally arrives?
You bring Pete to an appropriate end point, as he discovers some home truths: that he should have confidence in himself as he is, that the bullies who tormented him were fallible people with insecurities of their own, and that being himself is the route to success with Kara (well, that and a good makeover). Having a fitting end point for your protagonist is a good attribute in a script; so long as you're aware of the "lesson" your protagonist needs to learn, the false goal they're aiming for and the true goal they need to recognize, you havea strong "core" to the script. If things go a little awry in the second act (and they do, somewhat), it's just a matter of remedying this. The spine of the script remains strong.
What do you think needs work?
It's problematic to specify too many songs in the script; you may not be able to secure the rights to use them. It's best to refer to generic types of song if it's absolutely necessary (in the karaoke scene, for instance), rather than being specific. The karaoke sequence itself is overlong; it should only take one song to establish that Pete's unabashed taste for cheesy music endears him to Kara.
Why is Simon so determined to seduce Kara? He's an odiously self-absorbed and cocksure character, obviously, but he has a vested interest in keeping Morty (and, by extension, Pete) happy. It should be easy for Pete to persuade Simon to follow orders and make him lookgood without threatening his relationship with Kara. You need to establish convincingly why Simon goes "rogue" and pursues his own agenda at the risk of angering Morty (who holds the keys to his career in his hands, of course). The mechanics of the plot need a little attention here.
Some of the contests between Simon and Pete (the relay race and the rock-climbing contest) seem a little unnecessary. The second act feels slightly dramatically flaccid. Once we know that Pete has a circle of friends who are prepared to help him defeat Simon, we never feel that Simon is a serious threat to Pete's happiness. Write to increase the possibility that Kara will fall for Simon; make him more of a real romantic threat. Deepen Kara as a character; she feels slightly one-dimensional, a "prize" for Pete to win rather than a distinctive personality in her own right.
Pete, an anti-social loser, hires a male model, Simon, to attend his high school reunion cruise as Pete to "wow" his former classmates. But when Simon falls for Kara, Pete's high school crush, Pete takes matters into his own hands and battles the model for her heart.
The feedback.....
What did you like about this script?
Pete's initial humiliation-by-wedgie is an amusing scene. Pete clearlyseems destined for a life of humiliation and sexual failure; youeffectively set him up as a protagonist who needs to transform himself and his life.
When we jump forward chronologically, you swiftly establish that Pete is still a put-upon individual: his good nature is exploited by his colleagues, who pile their work upon him. His dress sense may have improved (slightly), but he seems no closer to romantic success. Will the impending school reunion enable Pete to correct wrong turns that he's previously taken, or will it just be a reminder of his sexual and social failure as a teenager, a pattern that heappears to be stuck in?
You quickly establish Simon as a rather vacuous, self-absorbed hunk.The scenes in which he feigns concern for the starving Africans before switching to diva-esque behavior between takes are amusing (if a little obvious). The impending reunion sets the main plot in motion:Pete hires Simon to impersonate him, creating the impression that he'ssucceeded in life. It's a premise that has comic potential. We already anticipate that things won't go quite according to plan; is Pete's aspiration (to impress everyone with "his" (Simon's) good looks and material success) a false goal? Perhaps accepting himself and being unashamed will prove to be his true goal.
You derive some farcical energy from the scenes on the boat. You quickly show Pete's plan coming unravelled: Simon wants Kara for himself, while Pete discovers that Kara actually had a crush on theold, socially-maladjusted him; he'd have been better off appearingunder his own guise rather than that of the fictitious "Chuck". Of course, Kara hates liars, so he feels compelled not to come forward immediately (a narrative contrivance that is just about convincing).
You tighten the screws on Pete as Simon appears to be successfully winning Kara's heart. How will he undo the confusion he's caused? Can he hope to win Kara away from Simon? Will the (unavoidable) revelation of his true identity anger Kara when it finally arrives?
You bring Pete to an appropriate end point, as he discovers some home truths: that he should have confidence in himself as he is, that the bullies who tormented him were fallible people with insecurities of their own, and that being himself is the route to success with Kara (well, that and a good makeover). Having a fitting end point for your protagonist is a good attribute in a script; so long as you're aware of the "lesson" your protagonist needs to learn, the false goal they're aiming for and the true goal they need to recognize, you havea strong "core" to the script. If things go a little awry in the second act (and they do, somewhat), it's just a matter of remedying this. The spine of the script remains strong.
What do you think needs work?
It's problematic to specify too many songs in the script; you may not be able to secure the rights to use them. It's best to refer to generic types of song if it's absolutely necessary (in the karaoke scene, for instance), rather than being specific. The karaoke sequence itself is overlong; it should only take one song to establish that Pete's unabashed taste for cheesy music endears him to Kara.
Why is Simon so determined to seduce Kara? He's an odiously self-absorbed and cocksure character, obviously, but he has a vested interest in keeping Morty (and, by extension, Pete) happy. It should be easy for Pete to persuade Simon to follow orders and make him lookgood without threatening his relationship with Kara. You need to establish convincingly why Simon goes "rogue" and pursues his own agenda at the risk of angering Morty (who holds the keys to his career in his hands, of course). The mechanics of the plot need a little attention here.
Some of the contests between Simon and Pete (the relay race and the rock-climbing contest) seem a little unnecessary. The second act feels slightly dramatically flaccid. Once we know that Pete has a circle of friends who are prepared to help him defeat Simon, we never feel that Simon is a serious threat to Pete's happiness. Write to increase the possibility that Kara will fall for Simon; make him more of a real romantic threat. Deepen Kara as a character; she feels slightly one-dimensional, a "prize" for Pete to win rather than a distinctive personality in her own right.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Best of 2008
Ok, I'm way late on this but haven't updated in a while. Working on a few scripts and have finally settled on one, a comedy called Born Again Christian. Act 1 is done and I'm onto Act 2.
So here's my "Bests" lists of 2008, music & film. Music-wise is not an order, there were several important albums to me, hard to pick a best.
Coldplay - Viva La Vida & Prospekt's March - Both the album & EP brought us some amazing songs. Lovers In Japan, Life In Technicolor (1 & 2), Lost, Strawberry Swing....
Radiohead - In Rainbows - Not their best album, for me that's The Bends, but it had some amazing moments, none better than Videotape.
Weezer - Not incredible but solid. It has two wonderful songs, The Angel & The One as well as The Greatest Man That Ever Lived.
Best Flicks -
1. Let The Right One In - The direction. Cinematography. Acting. The snow. The blood. And the pool scene. Whoa. Currently being re-made by us silly Americans, which is a shame.
2. Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist - Beyond a fun, cool soundtrack is the smart script, directing and wonderful acting. It feels like you're there, because you'd had this kind of night. The night that nothing yet everything happens, and the night you'll never forget.
3. In Bruges - Stellar. A dark, pitch black comedy. Ralph Fiennes, Colin Farrell and ....are at the top of their game, with a cool biting script.
4. Milk - Fantastic.
5. The Wrestler - Mickey Rourke & Evan Rachel Wood sitting by the ocean. That's truth.
So here's my "Bests" lists of 2008, music & film. Music-wise is not an order, there were several important albums to me, hard to pick a best.
The Airborne Toxic Event - An amazing debut, and every song on this album is terrific. And the album-ender, Innocence, might just be one of the best songs I've heard in years. If I picked a number 1 this would be it.
Keane - Their 3rd album, Spiraling. A little more energetic than their 1st two, just about everysong on here is solid. And like Airborne Toxic, it has an amazing closer - Love Is The End.
James - Hey Ma - Great, great, great from start to finish. Waterfall is a stand out.
Coldplay - Viva La Vida & Prospekt's March - Both the album & EP brought us some amazing songs. Lovers In Japan, Life In Technicolor (1 & 2), Lost, Strawberry Swing....
Radiohead - In Rainbows - Not their best album, for me that's The Bends, but it had some amazing moments, none better than Videotape.
Weezer - Not incredible but solid. It has two wonderful songs, The Angel & The One as well as The Greatest Man That Ever Lived.
Sigur Ros - No, I don't know what the singer is singing, but the music is powerful and inspiring.
Charlatans UK - You Cross My Path - Welcome back, guys. A solid return to form.
MGMT - Time To Pretend - This is a grand album, with songs that sneak up on you. And just try NOT to dance to the song, Time to Pretend.
Youth Group - The Night Is Ours - they've still never topped their amazing debut but this is still a fine album. A fave is Dying At Your Own Party.Best Flicks -
1. Let The Right One In - The direction. Cinematography. Acting. The snow. The blood. And the pool scene. Whoa. Currently being re-made by us silly Americans, which is a shame.
2. Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist - Beyond a fun, cool soundtrack is the smart script, directing and wonderful acting. It feels like you're there, because you'd had this kind of night. The night that nothing yet everything happens, and the night you'll never forget.
3. In Bruges - Stellar. A dark, pitch black comedy. Ralph Fiennes, Colin Farrell and ....are at the top of their game, with a cool biting script.
4. Milk - Fantastic.
5. The Wrestler - Mickey Rourke & Evan Rachel Wood sitting by the ocean. That's truth.
6. The Dark Knight - Yup, Ledger is amazing, and even if he hadn't died tragically, he still should have won that Oscar. But more than that, this is a great film.
7. Role Models -It could have been a dumb, thoughtless romp. It wasn't.
8. Wall-E - A beauty.
9. Forgetting Sarah Marshall - Same as with Role Models. Coulda be a waste but it really rocked.
10. Burn After Reading - not the Coens' best, but it's tight, smart and fun/fucked up.
Coulda been good but was really just Ok......Benjamin Button - Yeah, it was pretty much EXACTLY like Forrest Gump, plot-point for plot-point. Characters, too. Same writer as well. And dialogue that mirrored each other. ("My name is Forrest. Forrest Gump"...."My name is Benjamin. Benjamin Button")...BUT it still told an interesting story.
My main problem was it was too cold. Some critics applauded because Fincher left out some of the shmaltz. Well, having a heart and pouring on the shmaltz are 2 different things. The movie lacked a heart.
Saturday, December 27, 2008
BACK
It's been a weird fucking year. 2008. It can go, can't wait 'til it does.
I thought 2007 was a weird one.
I wish I had 2007 back.
It's also hard to believe that 2008 is already over. I have these mini-flashbacks of events that happened this year that seemed like they JUST happened.
Bascially, life is moving r e a l l y fast. We all know this, of course, but it's amazing how fast it does go when you think about crap like that.
Scripts:
I was trying to get my horror script done but my head/heart/guts just aren't into it.
I had 3 script requests before the holidays - The Money Shot, The Stand-In, and A Couple Of Joes. Sent them out, hope to hear something in January. Fingers crossed.
Bloom/Separation Of Nate - Haven't gotten much done on it lately but an adjustment here, a tweak there.
Westville - Still love this one, and I think it'll be the one I finish next. I've got Act 1 done and I'm happy with it, and I'm well into Act 2. It's a fun script, has elements of Diner & American Graffitti.
Titan - This was my high school drama. Not about a shooting (although it touches on one) but focuses on one kid who is pretty much left behind, bullied, etc, and how his life falls apart. I think a story like this will always be topical - maybe too much so - I'd hate to rip off some story of some poor kid from a current headline.
And I've got about 5-6 others that I look at every now & then, itching to click on the file and getting back to them.
Movies:
Saw some stuff here & there.....
Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist - Loved this. A sweet movie, great performances, and a killer soundtrack.
Burn After Reading - Smart & fun as hell.
Milk - Really well done. Sean Penn was superb, and Gus Van Sant really poured his heart into this.
Let The Right One In - A stunner.
Role Models - Funniest movie of the year of good, funny movies. Also loved Tropic Thunder, but Role Models is better. Jane Lynch is great in support - will someone give this lady an award already?!
The Day The Earth Stood Still - Not horrible.
Changeling - Interesting story. Had the pace of a dead tortoise but was a decent film, just something I'd never really watch again.
Can't wait to see: The Wrestler, Benjamin Button
Happy holidays.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
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