Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Star Wars, Yo

Why the hell didn't Tarkin (and the Death Star) just blast through the planet with their LASER DEATH RAY which would have revealed the moon that the rebel base was on, and then blast the shit out of that, too? They took out Alderaan earlier on, so the size shouldn't have been a problem. I'm probably late to hop onto this question, I'm sure it's been brought up before, and maybe someone even asked George Lucas about it.....and then he led them behind Skywalker Ranch and Godfathered them to death.

Sith is out, as we know. And I usually scoop up Star Wars stuff as soon as it hits the shelves, but not this time. I'll get it soon, just to complete my collection, but I'm just soured on Star Wars. Don't get me wrong, they're still better than half the stuff out there, and better than 99% of sci-fi movies that are released, but the stench of the first 2 prequels made the 3rd one just a good movie instead of an amazing end to what should have been a fantasic story (the prequels). Georgie got stuck in a bland love story, and Menace was a complete waste. In my book, if I had written the damn things, the story would begin with Attack of the Clones, maybe have some of the important plot points touched on at the beginning, have the Clone Wars set up for my version of the 2nd (and I mean actually show the damn Wars, not the tail end of them, or wait for some arty cartoon to show them (ok, it's a cool cartoon, but still). They're so referenced and discussed in the original trilogy, that I think they should have been shown to us further. We love them battles, man!

Then having robots and clones battle each other, I mean, who cares? It's like a bunch of rocks fighting each other, we don't know them, and don't give a rat's. Anakin's gotta turn sooner, or start to, and have more time with Obi-Wan (they need to be closer as friends or at least apprentice/mentors) so their battle at the end MEANS something emotionally.

Lucas didn't have it all wrong, I mean, he's got the visuals down, and all the Palpatine stuff is spot on. I can still watch the original trilogy with wonder and awe, it's just a shame that I watch the new trilogy and go Hmm, okay then. And it's also a shame that George apparently doesn't give a poop.

But who am I , just some home inspector in NJ trying to sell a flippin screenplay, so maybe George is right.

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