So, what's the WORST movie you EVER saw? After checking out some reponses over at Scott The Reader's latest blog, I was inspired to think back on the biggest pieces of shit I ever wasted my movie-going time on. Some lowlights.....
Firebirds - Nicholas Cage, Sean Young, Tommy Lee Jones, and some Apache helicopters. Dreadful.
A Kiss Before Dying - Sean Young (See a pattern?). Terrible, terrible.
Meatballs 4 - Featuring Corey Feldman and that levitating alien freak, what a great way to take a huge shit all over the original movie (which I liked). Parts 2 & 3 (featuring a young, awkward, Patrick Dempsey) were bad enough, but this cockscab of a movie brings it to a whole new sub-level of bad.
Mac & Me - Diarrhea on film.
Darkman - I may have liked it when it first came out years ago (1991?),and if that's the case I was young and stupid. I saw it last year and what a horribly made/acted/directed/written/shot piece of garbage.
Alien 3 - I still hate this movie. I don't care if ol' Fincher had to re-cut or if the movie was taken away from him, etc, etc. The plot sucked, and it took the story from the 1st two AMAZING FILMS and flushed it all down the toilet. I actually enjoyed Alien 4 much more than this crap.
Alien Vs. Predator - Stupid. Please don't make another. Too late? dammit!
Vertical Limit - Okay, your sister is trapped on a mountain so you piss and moan until you can assemble a team of climbers to help you go get her, and you get MOST of them killed in the process. Nice going, douche. when I saw this in the theater I also noticed the BOOM POLE or an actual film crew member in 80% of the shots, and I'm not lying.
Superman 4 - Quest 4 Peace - Christ Almighty. The battle with Blonde Man was lame enough, but did they notice that a HUMAN BEING was brought up into SPACE and was just floating there, not dying???
The Village - I think M.Night is an awesome director, I just wish he'd stop writing.
Catwoman - Meeooowch! I don't mind watching Halle Berry prance around in tight leather, but have her fight a villain better than - A cosmetics empire?!?!?! Directed by Pitof. 'Nuff said.
Wing Commander - Dumb as a bag of dead monkeys.
A Lot Like Love - Actually harmful to watch.
Chicago - God, how I despised this.
High Tension - Poor taste, and crappy, too.
Shark boy & Lava Girl - I like Robert Rodriguez but this was simply a crap movie.
Iron Eagle 3: Aces - Poor Louis Gossett, Jr.
Most John Waters movies. No, wait, all of them.
That's all I can come up with off the top of my head. I'm sure I'll think of more. What are some of yours??